Another ReDesign of the Wheel

The Blastolene Decoliner

2012-01-19T22:09:00.001-05:00

I've been watching the progress of this beast since it's inception on Blastolene.com and it's even cooler to see it completed.

The Blastolene Story - by Tuned

5th wheel

2011-03-07T12:34:00.000-05:00

sdffg

From MAKE: via ottomatik

I think I know a few people who could use this.

Biking Statistics 2010

2011-01-03T20:47:00.000-05:00

Dismal.
Last year big miles. 2875
This year not so much.
620 by mid-July and nothing after that.

The culprit? Work.

And that's enough of that.
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Don't look at me, try the usual suspect

2011-01-03T20:14:00.000-05:00

Tonight I walked into the living room to find it in its usual disarray. Legos, chairs, blankets and general kiddie crap strewn all around, and no, we have not caught up from the Christmas onslaught. Unfortunately one of the items on the floor was a difficult 100 piece puzzle that DaGirl and I had put together last night.

DaGirl was sitting at the coffee table putting another puzzle together and DaBoy was about six feet behind her. When I look at DaGirl and asked her if she had spread the puzzle across the floor she looked at be with big brown eyes and frowned.

Before I knew what was happening her thumb popped up and was discreetly pointing to her brother behind her. When my gaze focused on him he was kneeling amongst a pile of Legos, looking at me with a goofy smile, and waving like a loon.

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"Pretty Girl"

2010-09-26T23:15:00.000-04:00

Tonight was a lazy night. We didn't want to mess up the kitchen any more than necessary so we ate out at a fancy burger chain. We were seated near the hostess station that was being staffed by three people, so plenty was going on for DaKids to watch.

At one point while we were eating DaBoy's eyes were wandering and one of the hostesses noticed him and said "Hi" to him as she walked passed.

His face went blank and he just stared at her back.

After a few seconds of staring I said to DaMom "I think we've lost him to the pretty girl." Another 5 or 10 seconds pass while he's still staring at her and he quietly announces "Pretty Girl." DaMom and I burst out laughing and his trance is finally broken.

Later when DaMom and DaGirl are in the restroom, DaBoy is peering at her backside again and says "Pretty girl over there."
DaGoof: Are you going to say goodbye when we leave?
DaBoy: Yep (with a bobble head nod)
DaGoof:: What are you going to say?
DaBoy: *shrugs*
DaGoof: Say "Goodbye Pretty Girl"
DaBoy: Goodbye Pretty Girl

I continued coaching him right up until DM and DG's return and we got up to leave. I carried him over to the station and said " go on say it." Unfortunately she was busy looking over the seating chart with someone.
DaBoy: very quietly "gbye retty grl"
DaGoof: Say it again louder.
DaBoy: Goodbye Pretty Girl.

She didn't notice him with all the noise in the restaurant and I didn't want to press my luck with him flipping out so I just turned and headed for the door, grabbing a balloon on the way by. The Pretty Girl may not have noticed but one of the other hosts did as he was opening the door for us and he asked "What did he say to her?"

I told him and he went back inside while we stopped at the bench outside to tie the balloons to DaKids wrists.

Not a few moments after the balloons are tied off and we were heading for the bookstore does Pretty Girl come outside and say "goodbye little guy."

DaBoy stared right back and said again "Goodbye Pretty Girl." He was so dumbstruck we had to drag him away from the storefront while he had an ear-to-grin repeating "Goodbye Pretty Girl."

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Wheel Drought

2010-08-30T12:58:00.001-04:00

Well doesn't this bite?

Nearly 6 weeks and no riding (sans the mini trips with the kids in the trailer).

Is this project over yet?

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This Museum

2010-08-18T21:16:00.000-04:00

Tonight at bedtime while DaGirl was lying in bed she made the following proclamation:

DaGirl: This place is like a museum.
DaGoof:: What?

DaGirl: Museum.
DaGoof: Museum? What's like a museum?
DaGirl: This place is like a toy museum.
DaGoof: A toy museum?
DaGirl: Yeah!
DaGoof: You have entirely too many toys, eh?
DaGirl: uh-huh

g

So there....

2010-08-09T21:07:00.000-04:00

Today while outside in the yard DaGirl and DaBoy were playing with the water table and being their usual selves while DaMom was sitting in a chair in a shady spot on the other side of the yard reading a book.

DaGirl ventured over to the Dogwood trees, placed a chair next to one, and proceeded to try and climb the tree. When she looked up to see if she was going to get into trouble she saw DaMom looking at her and said "You're not supposed to be watching, you're supposed to be watching your book!"

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In the Genes and not in the Manual

2010-07-26T23:13:00.001-04:00

Once upon a time when I was a wee lad I did something I shouldn't have and to this day I am reminded of it by my mother. It happened before my memory started kicking in so I must have been 4 or younger. I don't remember why I did it but it must have seemed like a good idea at the time. Much like the lamp incident, when my kids break stuff my mother tells this tale:

I stuck gum in the tape deck of the stereo. It took my father quite a while to clean it out but to his credit he got it to work again.

How does an incident that happened 30 odd years ago relate to something in the present day?

DaBoy stuck some change into the CD player of the car, moments before we left on a two hour drive to Aunty K's. I wasn't sure exactly what (or how much) he put into the slot at first but I did manage to get a dime out of the dust guard. The radio still worked until I tried to place a cd into the player. It made for a long ride out and back. When we got there I went to lock the car with the key fob and.... nothing... huh?

I did what any good engineer would do, I RTFM'd and pulled the radio our to retrieve the remaining change (2 quarters). So the manual says the radio/accessory fuse is #8 under the steering column. The only problem is that fuse wasn't blown and the power door locks wouldn't work with the car off. If the car was running the power door locks would work.

WTF?

Tonight I did some more poking around and checked all of fuses under the dash. None were blown. ???
I also noticed the dome light would not work when the doors were opened but did work when the switch was flipped???

To recap: The radio doesn't work at all, the power door locks work if the car is on but not off, and the dome light only works if the switch if set to ON, not when the doors open.

I then checked the logical fuses under the hood and.....nothing. So I checked the remaining fuses under the hood and found #9 was blown. A 10 amp fuse labeled "Backup" ??? Replace that one and all is well.

The moral of this story? My son is definitely my son and wiring in the Honda is not as it labeled.

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The Long Weekend - Part 2

2010-06-01T22:15:00.000-04:00

Friday's oddities

These lug nuts can't be legal

The worst looking, Charlie Brown tree on the Pike

LFD's Fire Ducks

The LONG Weekend - Part 1

2010-06-01T21:53:00.000-04:00

Friday

In the never ending quest to entertain and wear out DaKids, I took the day off and we all went to the Boston Children's Museum. The day was filled with it's own adversity's.

First, on the way out there a semi loaded with flour overturned on the pike, delaying us for over an hour.

This delay meant that we were going to cut the time very close to the last train out of the commuter rail station for a while. So we beat feat and nearly made the train had the directions not sent us to the wrong side of the station! OK fine, we head over to a red line T stop sort of nearby.

Have I mentioned they love trains?

Once we finally got to South Station we had a quick bite to eat then wandered over to the Museum. DaKids loved the sights and sounds of the city but DaBoy has this fear of people and insisted to be carried all the way there. (ouch)

When we got there the sensory overload began. There was so much going on between the kids and activities, DaGirl bounced from room to room faster than a high bounce ball. They had a blast:

Knocking over the life-sized chess pieces.

Broadcast on TV!

Flying the "airplane"

Riding in the rocket

Driving the float

Driving the Bobcat

There was a ton more they did that I could not get pictures of since there was so many people and rude little kids getting in the way. Not to mention trying to keep up with our kids. There were three adults and two kids and we still managed to lose track of each child at least once. Exhausting!

Once we deemed the fun was over, we headed toward The Barking Crab for a proper lunch (more like early dinner) but not before a little peaceful view of the city.

Or not

Once at the restaurant DaBoy promptly fell asleep in Aunty K's lap.

And DaGirl was just an "angel" with an umbrella in her hair

Next stop, the Lexington Fire Department to visit Uncle A. for our own personalized tour of the station.
DaBoy was so excited he couldn't contain himself and DaGirl was a bit cranky when we got there (we had to wake her up when we got there) but she eventually warmed up and was just as excited to be there.

DaBoy thrilled behind the wheel of the ladder truck

DaBoy trying on Uncle A.'s "hat"

DaMom sporting the oversize bunker coat and hat

Boots nearly as large as DaBoy

Norman Rockwell moment

DaGirl eventually woke/warmed up

They loved the ambulance (yes that's his tongue hanging out)

DaGirl with the "hat"

And what could be a better way to end a private tour of a fire station? All the trucks to leave on a call of course.

Out goes the Chief

Uncle A.'s drives the ladder truck away

All in all it was a blast of a day!
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Best retort of the day

2010-05-19T17:00:00.005-04:00

My Boss: I forgot to tell you what orientation we need the output to be.
DaGoof: Ugh, really?
MB: Let's look at the model.
*Opening files*
(after much discussion)
MB: Damn, it's V not H. Does that make you hate me?
DaGoof: It's a good thing Christmas is a long way off, you've got a lot of reparations to make if you want to get a card from me.

Sim City meets plumbers nightmare - and it needs to change, again.

Don't Mess....Part 2

2010-05-17T06:00:00.000-04:00

In response to Don't Mess with OUR 'Hood I found this in the town paper:

10:25 p.m. – Police received a call
about mailbox vandalism on F____ St.
Through an investigation, police learned
four youths were horsing around near
the box, causing it to collapse. The damage
to the box was unintentional. The
youth who caused the box to fall
obtained a new mailbox for the resident
and no charges were filed.

A couple of things bother me about this; 1.) that mail box had been up all winter long. On this street a "snow deflector" is required or you have to pick your mailbox up after every storm (think large highway plows on rural streets @ 40mph) and a little nudge knocked it off?. 2.) "Horsing around", "unintentional" ...and left the mailbox in the middle of the road? Not cool. 3.) "No charges were filed"..... I hope they got the stuff scared out of them because we are far to lenient on our kids. Sure, no one wants to see "their" kid in shackles but if there are not proper consequences for actions what is to keep them from vandalizing again and again?
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"That Was My Idea....."

2010-05-12T16:13:00.000-04:00

Now that I have received this message on the worst work week known to mankind, I'll re-post it.

Honest message, eh?
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How to Spend a Sunday Evening

2010-05-10T23:16:00.000-04:00

DaMom has been "requesting" some new raised beds for the garden after the old ones imploded shortly after DaGirl was born. The old ones were cedar and worked well until we stopped keeping up with the garden and the weeds in and around the boxes held moisture close to the boards and "enhanced" the rotting process......and maybe, just maybe I may have run into a few with the lawn mower while trying to clear said weeds.

DaMom had been requesting new plastic raised beds as a Mother's Day gift. I had made two 4 x 12 foot boxes from plastic decking several years ago to supplement the 8 older wooden ones (did I mention it's a big garden?). She had been struggling all day to find a relative that would watch DaKids so we could go and get the plastic decking material.

As it turned out DaGirl and I ended up taking the Element and the trailer to a couple home centers to acquire the appropriate material. The first only had a back relieved, dark brown plank that wouldn't match the existing gray plastic boxes and might not work well turned on it's side. The next stop had the right stuff and $220 later we had the stuff for two 6 x 6 and two 4 x 12 boxes.

We got the napless children into bed and asleep by 7:45 so then I finally got out to start cutting. An hour and fifteen minutes later I had all the long lengths cut, the Upright/Corner Blocks cut & split, and the half of the uprights installed. I would have continued but the cordless drill battery had had enough.

Yup it's Dark at 9pm

Material Cut to Length

Upright/Corner Block Installation

Hopefully I can get the remainder attached before the weekend.
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Broken Spoke is at it again...

2010-05-05T21:33:00.007-04:00

Last April I wrote about how my road bike earned it's name Broken Spoke. After nearly 3000 miles the bike claimed another spoke yesterday.

No one seems to have a non-race replacement wheel around this place. grrr

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Storm Front

2010-05-05T21:31:00.000-04:00

This was the scene yesterday at work @ 4:00

The wind picked up, dust from nearby fields made the sky brown, then the temperature dropped 20 degrees and the power went out. Debris kicked up from everywhere and the clouds above started swirling.

The storm broke trees like twigs and only lasted a few minutes.

Where's a tornado chaser when you need one? Oh yeah, it's in Oklahoma "chasing" tornadoes. Too bad, all we needed to do was roll it outside and we would had some neat data.:-)
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Out of the mouth of DaGirl

2010-05-03T22:12:00.000-04:00

Tonight at dinner she had these little gems.
"This salad is just like popcorn."
"These strawberries are just like pizza."
"Strawberries come from big trees."

She needs to work on her metaphors a little bit ;-)
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Don't Mess with OUR 'Hood

2010-05-03T13:00:00.001-04:00

In my neighborhood, we all have a fair amount land and the houses are rather spaced apart but I know most, if not all, of my surrounding neighbors and many heading up to the end of the street. And if I don't know them, I'm 99% positive they know who I am (walking a dog twice a day, every day for 8 years has that effect).

I had just finished watching a movie on Saturday night and I hear my neighbor (S1) yelling. Usually if he goes on a bender it's an all night affair but he had been quiet until then (10pm). I get up and watch to see what he's doing from the side door. He's walking back to his truck from the end of the driveway. WTF??? He walks back up the driveway and shines a light down the side walk. ??? I walk to the other side of the house and look out another window and see someone laying down in my other neighbors (S&L's) yard. S1's light hits him and he runs up S&L's driveway heading for the woods.

I throw my shoes on, grab a light, and head out the door. I can hear him crashing through the brush but it's too dark to see him or which way he went. I scan the area for a bit until I hear S1 talking to someone. I head over the other side of the yard and discover him talking with another neighbor (of the same name), S2. S2 is a state trooper. S2 says his wife saw four kids heading up the road with bats and bash a mailbox near their house.

I stick around long enough to get the story and that S1 was just getting home when he saw these characters hiding in the lawns. As I am heading back down the sidewalk in front of my house I see someone walking towards me. It's K, from 3 doors down. She and her husband were just getting home when they saw someone lingering around their yard. K's husband stopped the kid and started questioning him, while K was trying to figure out if something was going on in the neighborhood.

By the time we were heading back to the house the police show up and start looking around and head off to the side street that runs behind us.

I don't know if they caught the little buggers but the knuckleheads were some stupid:

Our street sees a lot of speeders so it's patrolled regularly by the police.
The college at the end of the street just finished their multimillion dollar boat house and public safety goes by at least twice an hour to check on it.
Plus these bozos were doing this at 10:00, let me guess, they had to get in their malice before their 11:00 curfew? If that's the case then they missed it. "Junior, where in the hell were you?" "umm, hiding from the police and a lynch mob in the woods...."

I can't believe just how stupid the youth are in my town. You'd like to think that they just might put 2 and 2 together and figure out that they are under a microscope given the national media they have received for the last 4 months. But alas, apparently our schools don't teach consequences well enough.

Don't mess our 'hood!
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The commute starts here...

2010-04-28T07:38:00.000-04:00

...sort of

Catching a lift @ MHC

Umm, no Officer.....

2010-04-27T12:42:00.001-04:00

As Relayed from DaMom....

The following event took place at 8:40am, on April 27th 2010:
As DaMom was trying to get the kids to the car so DaGirl may go to school, a police car pulls down the driveway. And he pulls all the way down the driveway, not just a little bit to turn around. DaKids were standing on the deck dumbstruck by the sight of a cruiser so close.
Police Officer: Did you place a 911 call?
DaMom: um no?
PO: Were either of them playing with a phone?
DaMom: He was (pointing at DaBoy), I just hung it up.
PO: *stern look*
DaMom: He's not even 2 yet, he doesn't understand the phone.

Great now were going to be on the SHPD's most watched list....

Will our kids ever be easy?
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Pneumatic Gods: 3 , DaGoof: 0

2010-04-22T07:00:00.001-04:00

Last night's ride home wasn't so much fun. Technically, it wasn't even a ride. I left the building, walked over to the bike and didn't notice anything wrong. I attached my bag to the bike and pulled the bike off the rack. Still nothing seems strange until I mount it and the bike sinks. Huh? I get off the bike and sure enough it's flat as a pancake. The tires are stiff enough that it held the bike up.

I go inside and use the air compressor to pump the tire up to see how bad the leak is. The tubes are already filled with slime and I figure a little air and the problem may resolve itself. Not so much. In less than 15 seconds all the air I put in comes out. The tire shows no massive holes but there is obviously a hole in the tube. OK, time to dismount the tire. When I separate the tube from the tire a leg of a massive staple falls out.

Note the staple on the right

"Wow that's a big chunk of ugly" I think to myself.

Pneumatic Gods: 1 , DaGoof: 0

Next I try to patch the hole. Um, yeah, that doesn't work, the patch won't stick to the slime covered tube (since it all leaked out the monstrous hole).

Pneumatic Gods: 2 , DaGoof: 0

"OK no biggie I'll just put the spare tube in." *sigh* It has an even bigger hole in it. "I give up! Sandy, can I get a ride home with you?".......

Pneumatic Gods: 3 , DaGoof: 0

When I get home I discover that I must have been riding it this way for at least a little bit as evidenced by the spray under the rack

Boy does that need to be cleaned.....
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3 year old H-bomb

2010-04-20T13:00:00.000-04:00

On Sunday night DaGirl got a "new" house.

Yesterday DaGirl was outside in her "new" playhouse at 6:45am.
She played in the yard all morning.
Then they went to the park for two hours.
After lunch she refused to nap.

When I got home the fuse had long been set.

She was standing near the playhouse and DaMom left to get something for dinner. DaGirl saw the car moving and the cork popped.
She screamed "I WANNA GO WITH MOMMY!"
She punched the playhouse screaming "I WANNA GO WITH MOMMY!"
She flicked her hand in pain screaming "OUUUCH, I WANNA GO WITH MOMMY!"
I was in the driveway and moved toward her, staying on the other side of the fence, telling her pitching a fit isn't going to get her anywhere. Then I witness her little eyes fill with tears, her head (not just face) turn bright red, and guttural screams build from who knows where.

DaBoy was stood in the driveway, confused by the whole matter. It's not like he hasn't thrown a tantrum or two lately, but she came totally unhinged. I took them both inside and cleaned them up for dinner.

20 minutes later she's still going strong when DaMom pulls down the driveway. DaGirl plops down in her seat at the table and stops crying immediately. By the time DaMom enters she's fine and appears nothing was ever wrong.

I found the incident humorous and disturbing at the same time. It's funny since I knew she was overtired but she's obviously got some of the anger management issues I used to have.

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Food Revolution

2010-04-20T12:43:00.002-04:00

We don't have cable.
Too much $.

We don't have a dish.
Too much hassle.

We get our TV the old fashioned way, we Netflix it!
...or for up-to-date stuff it comes through the airwaves, Yes people still do that!

The only thing I miss is not being able to see the Sox games. However, the benefit to having only a few channels is that the kids don't watch much TV and sometimes when you want to veg out and your Netflix queue is in transit, you are held to the mercy of the programming of the over the air channels.

So we were watching TV a couple of Sundays back and advertisements for Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution came on. We were both horrified and riveted by the subject. Over the last 10 years of our marriage we have made great strides in eating healthier and reducing the overall quantity we consume. So naturally what appeared to be such a reality TV train wreck had to be watched.

The footage has definitely been edited to increase the "drama" that TV execs think create ratings but overall I think it is truthful. I can see some of the people I know fitting right into the mindset of the town he has descended upon. I live/work in a area that has a large number of CSA (Community Supported Agriculture) farm share programs, farm stands, and farmers markets. The people I'm thinking of regard all of these fresh food advocates as nutcases.

The first two episodes focus on the negatives. Things like; what the people don't know, how much junk food they eat, and how it will all kill them. I'm sure the way it is presented is mainly because it has to survive and gain viewers, but it does make one think. In fact, I wondered aloud to DaMom what our elementary school lunch menu looked like. DaGirl is in her first year of morning preschool there and doesn't eat lunch there. DaMom found a menu and brought it home:

School Lunch - April 2010

Sunday	Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday	Saturday
				Apr 1 1 ASSORTED SANDWICHES TOMATO SOUP CHILLED FRUIT OTIS SPUNKMEYER COOKIES	Apr 2 2 GOOD FRIDAY NO SCHOOL	Apr 3
Apr 4	Apr 5 5 CHICKEN PATTIE SANDWICH SHREDDED LETTUCE RICE PILAF MIXED FRUIT	Apr 6 6 STEAMED HOT DOGS RED. FAT “CAPE COD” CHIPS FRESH VEGGIES BLUEBERRIES W/ TOPPING	Apr 7 7 PIZZA POCKETS HERBED NOODLES GREEN BEANS CINNAMON APPLESAUCE	Apr 8 8 WHOLE GRAIN SPAGHETTI W/ MEAT SAUCE STEAMED PEAS BREAD & BUTTER SLICED PEACHES	Apr 9 9 ASSORTED SANDWICHES TURKEY NOODLE SOUP CHILLED FRUIT OTIS SPUNKMEYER COOKIES	Apr 10
Apr 11	Apr 12 12 BUILD YOU OWN BURGERS POTATO PUFFS SHREDDED LETTUCE SLICED PEARS	Apr 13 13 POP CORN CHICKEN MASHED POTATOES CORN NIBBLETS STRAWBERRY CUPS	Apr 14 14 STEAMED HOT DOGS BAKED BEANS “ROLD GOLD” PRETZELS CHILLED FRUIT	Apr 15 15 ½ DAY PARENT CONFERENCES	Apr 16 16 ½ DAY PARENT CONFERENCES	Apr 17
Apr 18	Apr 19 SPRING RECESS	Apr 20 SPRING RECESS	Apr 21 SPRING RECESS	Apr 22 SPRING RECESS	Apr 23 SPRING RECESS	Apr 24
Apr 25	Apr 26 26 GILARDI’S “WHOLE GRAIN” DOUBLE STUFF CRUST PIZZA TOSSED SALAD CHILLED FRUIT	Apr 27 27 SLOPPY JOE SANDWICHES FRENCH FRIES CORN NIBBLETS PEAR HALVES	Apr 28 28 FRENCH TOAST STICKS W/ SYRUP OVEN BAKED SAUSAGE ORANGE JUICE DICED PEACHES	Apr 29 29 TURKEY FRICASSE MASHED POTATOES STEAMED VEGGIES DINNER ROLL CINNAMON APPLE SLICES	Apr 30 30 ASSORTED SANDWICHES MINESTRONE SOUP CHILLED FRUIT OTIS SPUNKMEYER COOKIES

We were stunned by it. It's nearly as bad what's on the show!
I've seen the "kitchen" there. None of this stuff can be prepared fresh there, it all has to be prepackaged. There is one household sized stove and some warmers on a line.

And there in lies the problem; preserved, prepackaged, foods designed to meet bizarre guidelines established by a nationwide program. How can a french fry be considered a vegetable?

There is an obvious problem here.

http://www.jamieoliver.com/campaigns/jamies-food-revolution/petition

http://www.ted.com/talks/jamie_oliver.html

"You may never know what results come from your action. But if you do nothing, there will be no result."'--Mahatma Gandhi

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Sheared

2010-03-17T12:54:00.000-04:00

As I previously ranted about, some of us might have needed some hairs trimmed.

And to answer the question who broke first:

That would have been me on Saturday.
But true to her word DaMom got DaKids trimmed on Tuesday

DaMom was lamenting last night: "DaBoy" is not a baby anymore he looks like a little boy.

That was the goal wasn't it?
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OK Go

2010-03-03T07:00:00.001-05:00

This is so cool

I have a soft spot for Rube Goldberg machines.
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"Get a Haircut...

2010-02-23T22:07:00.001-05:00

...and I'll take "DaBoy" to get one!" she told me.

This isn't the first time I've been pestered about my locks:

As a kid my mother always complained about how short I'd have my hair cut, she loved my "waves."
DaMom's Aunty N always hates to see my hair short because I have "such nice curls."
DaMom's Memere loves the thickness of it.
DaMom doesn't like it too short, "the best length is about when you go and get it cut."
My mother-in-law usually has something to say about it if it is too long.
When I have a "bad" hair day (As seen to the right) folks at work offer their two cents.

I'm used to the peanut gallery you might say. I think it's humorous.

It seems every year I let my hair go forth and do its own thing. If there is one thing I know how to do, it's making myself look like hell. My last haircut was in August (I think). When it was time for my appointment I gave the slot to DaMom because her hair was bugging her. I never rescheduled.

A razor hasn't touched my face since Thanksgiving, I've been hacking it down with a beard trimmer every couple of weeks.

Last year I didn't even do that, I just let the beard grow and the wings fly out from under the hat.

Although I did learn how not to cut my hair last year.

This is probably the longest my hair has ever been. The race is on to see who can be the most stubborn. Not like any of us are stubborn here....(snicker)

It's cold out and I like some hair to keep me warm. In the summer it's sheared off because, you guessed it, it's hot outside.

DaBoy needs a haircut and DaMom won't take him to get one until I get one.

He looks like a little girl...

....the old lady's say so in public.

(His Aunty K put those pigtails in, blame her, not us.)

I know he isn't affected by it though. The other day Memere was "arguing" with him about what his gender was.
Memere: Are you mommy's little boy?
DaBoy: MAN

Memere: You are mommy's little boy?
DaBoy: MAN
Memere: Boy
DaBoy: MAN
This continued for a while.

Apparently he is referred to as a little man a bit too much around here. Although this is better than a few months ago when he kept saying he was a "gurl" and his sister was his "brutha".

So who will win the battle of wills?
...probably neither of us, Memere has threatened to take him, he looks like a girl after all.

A Little like this?

2010-02-17T08:40:00.000-05:00

I'm laying out the bed of a new Tornado Chaser at work. The guy in charge of the project made mention of using duct work as a cheap and easy method to provide the system with air. I knew it would look like hell when he said it so I picked out the bluest tubing I could get from McMaster and went to town.

I christen thee ECTO 1.1!!

Uh no...
My plan worked though! I finally got him to agree to sheet-metal ducting. A co-worker dubbed me the master of hyperbole here to get my way.
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A Preschooler's Views on Time Off

2010-02-16T07:16:00.000-05:00

DaGirl: Daddy, you have to take me to school today.
DaGoof: Sorry but there is no school this week
DaGirl: Why?
DaGoof: Because it's school vacation week
DaGirl: Vacation? I DON"T WANNA GO ON VACATION!
DaGoof: Some day you will...

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Work Related Computer Woes

2010-01-27T22:06:00.003-05:00

Resistance is futile....

you will be assimilated.

The Art of the Bus Chase - Part 2

2010-01-27T21:36:00.001-05:00

Not long after I started writing The Art of the Bus Chase - Part 1 my commuting nearly came to a halt. I'm not sure if I could pinpoint one reason for it but I'm sure the holiday's, snowstorms, frigid rain, and persistent head colds (yes plural) condemned the December mileage total to all of 84. Since we only had the one car and I wasn't about to drive a 44 year old truck on our snow/ice/crap covered New England roads, I had to modify my art form of bus chasing.

While riding the bike I never took note as to exactly where and when I was passing which bus. I just knew that certain buses ran more often than others and I was more likely to see #'s 31 and 30 more often than #'s 32 and 38. When I was acting "truck-lite" in December I needed to decipher the cryptic bus schedules and make my way to and from work by catching 2 bus routes at just right time and do a little walking. To add to the complexity of the bus schedule, they run certain routes less or alter their times when the colleges go on break.

This created huge amounts of frustration for me. Just when I got used to when I needed to leave to walk to a stop, the time of that stop shifted a few minutes or moved to the next hour. This conundrum has a lot to do with us buying the Honda. I couldn't see myself trying to adapt to these ever changing schedules and still end up late for work or getting home everyday.

This brings us to today's fun bus rides (plant tongue firmly in cheek, here). We dropped off the VW last night so they could figure out the check engine light issue which confunded me. I still needed to be a work today, soooo enter the Bus Chase.

Getting to the bus in the morning was easier than expected (both kids up and crying at various times throughout the night culminating with DaGirl in bed with DaMom and DaBoy on the couch with me just to get them both to sleep.) I was out the door and at the stop like I never stopped taking it. When the bus arrived however it became another story. The driver was still training so he was being overly cautious and flippin slow as molasses. When his shift ended at the second college and the observer took over, the driver switch was painfully slow and resulted in me missing my first chance at grabbing the second bus. When I finally arrived at work I had been gone from the house for almost an hour and a half. ugh!

DaMom's first quilting class of the new year is tonight so she was pretty adamant about me being home on time which meant I needed to fly out the door just a whisker before 5 to grab a bus. I was fortunate to grab an oddball route that actually took me all of the way to Atkin's where I could grab the final bus home. Tonight it took one hour door to door. Much better. Even though I figured tonight's first bus ride would get me to the right stop for the second bus on time, I still found myself checking my watch constantly.

It was the first time I've ever caught the buses right like that. The art is still under revision.

g

Cycle Speedway

2010-01-27T12:34:00.000-05:00

Once upon a time I used to work on oval track race cars.

This looks like more fun than I ever had pulling wrenches.

Found on Boston Biker

Flat Track Racing, Freewheels, No Brakes

Regression: returning to a former state

2010-01-25T22:05:00.000-05:00

As mentioned in the previous post DaGirl has been sick. As a result of this sickness she has not been to school since last Wednesday and that does not bode well for good nights of sleep.

I was on the phone with my parents this evening just after putting DaGirl down for bed. While I was on the phone I hear her chatting away. This chatting led to singing which finally led to bouncing on the bed.

When I eventually got to her room, I find all of the stuffed animals and blankets that usually reside in bed with her on the floor and she's dancing on the bed naked as a jay bird.

DaGoof: Where are all your clothes?
DaGirl: I dunno.
DaMom: (laughing hysterically down stairs) bahaahaa
DaGoof: Why did you take them off?
DaGirl: *shrugs*

Sound familiar? here here or here

g

Something Rings True Here

2010-01-25T12:45:00.000-05:00

After dinner last Sunday night DaBoy came down with a fever. It turned into a head cold and the fever effects lasted until Friday, now he's a bright, energetic, and happy booger face.

DaGirl picked up said cold from her brother on Thursday and was ill through the weekend.

DaMom has been trapped at home with at least one sick child since Monday. I was pinned down all weekend. So on Sunday Night, when neither of us wanted to cook, and Chinese was a mere 25 minute wait away, we went the takeout route. My fortune seemed appropriate.

Who says fortune cookies don't speak the truth?

g

This is too cool

2010-01-16T15:14:00.002-05:00

I saw this on the MAKE blog the other day.

Fordson Screw Drive Tractor
http://blog.makezine.com/archive/2010/01/fordson_snow_machine_handles_drifts.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Screw-propelled_vehicle

I want one...

g

and this is how bathtime is...

2010-01-16T14:53:00.000-05:00

everytime....

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One of the silly things we are building...

2010-01-10T14:19:00.000-05:00

This has not been altered in anyway.

The 8 foot diameter Antenna is spinning at 30rpm AND is mounted to the back of a truck!
g

Biking Statistics 2009

2010-01-08T13:02:00.001-05:00

The following is too keep a record of my cycling and KEEP my butt motivated to ride.

In March of 2009 I decided I would try my hand (legs really) at a goal of 2000 miles for the year. The goal seemed feasible and at the time was necessary to provide suitable motivation for riding everyday. Then the Exploder started having issues that I didn't want to deal with so subsequently it was donated just to be rid of it. This provided more inspiration than anything since we had only the one car and the buses stop running for the summer.

The 2009 Highlights:
I rode a total of 2875 miles between 18Mar and 16Dec (40 weeks).
On July 3rd I crossed the 1000 mile mark and on September 14th crossed the 2000 mile mark.

Commute route: 13.3 miles one way
Bike/Bus/Bike: 11.8 miles per day
Road bike: 2497.8 miles
Commuter Bike: 377.5 miles
Mtn Bike: 0 miles :-(
For fun: 7.8miles

The Details:

The only part of this that makes me sad is that for all these miles, none are on the mountain bike, my favorite bike.
g

Yup it's hereditary

2010-01-06T20:58:00.000-05:00

When I was a young I had a thing for lamps.

When I was real young, less than 2, I burned the palm of my hand grabbing an exposed light bulb.

I broke a lot of lamps before I was 4. My parents had these ugly glass globe lamps and I guess my inner eye knew these things were ugly and had to go. I must have massacred 5 or 6 of these.

My father, possessing the Yankee ingenuity gene, took a pair that I killed and rebuilt them in such a manner that I could do them no more harm. He took a section of 4 inch PVC pipe the height the globe had been and put it between the upper and lower collars that once held the globe. Then to add "style" he wrapped the pipe with blue yarn to match the living room decor of the time. I could not damaged the finished product and believe me I tried. These lamps lasted about ten years when finally it was decided they outlived their purpose and replaced.

DaBoy has taken a liking to lamps as well and tonight I came home to this...

Yes, this is a three legged lamp with one leg broken off. Yes, this lamp is made of wrought iron. Yes, DaBoy is only 18 months and 25 pounds.

So just how do I make wrought iron stronger?

g

Gestapo in the school

2010-01-04T11:11:00.001-05:00

DaMom is sick today, she has the same stomach bug I had on Friday night. Not a pleasant topic. At any rate she's sleeping in and I'm taking the day off to handle DaKids.

I carry out DaMom's mumbled instructions and get both kids out the door by 8:45. (Getting them in the car is another story) Now I know DaGirl is supposed to be at school for 9:00 but I'm unsure of the time lienency they give. We're in the parking lot at 8:52.

Apparently this is too early.

DaGirl sees the teacher's aid getting out of her car and is overly excited to see her and is emphatically attempting to get her attention. She's shouting hello, banging on the window and generally making a rucus. We're a little slow to get out of the car (you know two kids in car seats) and when we cross the parking lot DaGirl is trying to chase down the aid...

...and we go to the wrong door.

I'm very rudely told of this fact by a teacher who is younger than I and she's backed up by an even younger teacher. They point across the cafeteria to the door I should be entering, which ironically is merely 40 ft away straight through the room. "you have to wait for them to open the door" one of them barks at us.

Lets paint the full picture here:
A dad carrying an 18 month old toddler, who doesn't want to walk but doesn't want to be carried either, is being dragged across a snow/salt/sand mess of a parking lot by a 3 year old hell bent on catching a teacher she adores. The teachers saw us walking up to the door and try close it in our faces but thought better of it when I looked at them with a crooked head and inquisitive face.

I'm obviously out of my element and these people offer no compassion at all. I guess what pisses me off is that when DaGirl turned three on Halloween and was eligible to start preschool the following Monday. No one offered DaMom any help either. Apparently 2 months into the school year no one is allowed to start fresh. The crappy paperwork the school hands out is all geared toward kindergarden and up. There is no mention that there is even a preschool in the joint and certainly nothing telling someone how they are supposed to get past the guards armed with nothing more than bad attitudes. I understand that the school policy is to lockdown the school during the day but come on, I'm trying to drop off my kid, nothing more.

I'm starting to remember why I never liked the teachers I had when I was in school, they had rules that made little sense in the big picture of life and offered no rational explanation of them. Explain the rules to me and why they exist and I will gladly follow. I have not nor will not follow any one/thing blindly.

Then when they do finally open the doors and I'm trying to escort DaGirl to her class room I'm reminded of why I hate school breaks. Floor polishing. While carrying DaBoy I step off the mat in front of the door and look like a comic book character trying to regain his footing and fall on my back. Great new year.

They really ought to post the entrances better.

g

....and it was over just like that.

2009-12-31T21:24:00.000-05:00

The dream of a new bicycle.

After numerous delays and procrastinations we finally broke down and bought another car. I was hoping to make it through the winter with just the car. If we did, I promised myself a nice new bike to commute in the spring with. But the best laid plans of mice and men....

It was nice not having any car payments to make and only needing to feed one car (and truck, albeit bi-monthly).

If we made a one car family work for 7 months, why do we need another car now?
1 - Was it the cold?
2 - Was it the snow?
3 - Was it the ice?
4 - Was it the salt?
5 - Was it the lack of public transportation?
6 - Was it the some of the people on the public transportation?
7 - Was it the constant commentary from some people at work?

and the verdicts?
1 - Sorta, I'm no bike martyr.
2 - Yes, roads here suck in the snow.
3 - Yes, see #2
4 - Oh yes, they practically throw marbles out of the sanders.
5 - No, as long as I'm willing to wait for the buses they're not that bad.
6 - Yup, there's some weird people on bus 31.
7 - No.

So, if the weather would cooperate, the insurance company would stay open (they closed early due to snow), the holidays would end we'd have a new to us Element sitting in the driveway.
g

Evening Fun

2009-11-23T20:44:00.000-05:00

Here's one for the books...

Tonight I left DaGirl in her room while I put DaBoy down. When I left the room she found her bathing suit on the floor and was chatting about it. I was out of her room for all of five minutes. I heard her moving around but since she was relatively quiet I figured all was OK.

When I got back to her room she was sitting in her bed with her bathing suit on her legs and shaking water out of her sippy cup onto her blue flannel sheet exclaiming "POOL! I swimming in my pool!"

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Someone's in a Hurry Here

2009-11-18T22:00:00.000-05:00

After dinner DaMom started the bath water when she was getting ready to leave for quilting class. Like a good mommy she closed the door behind her when she went upstairs as the filled the tub. Meanwhile DaKids and I were feeding the dog and cat. When we finished with the project of the pet food (and believe me it is a project) DaGirl wanted to play in the living room and watch TV.

DaGoof: "DaGirl", why don't go into the bathroom and get ready for a bath?
DaGirl: Oh, OK (and she scurries out of the kitchen)

DaBoy, who had been behind me, runs past to follow his big sister. I hear the bathroom door open as I'm filling the Dog's water dish. The sound I hear next emanating from the bathroom disturbs me.

DaGirl: No! "DaBoy" No! Don't get into da baf tub wif your clothes on!
DaBoy: Hehehehehe

I drop the water dish on the floor and run around the corner to find....

....DaBoy in the tub, fully dressed.

This marks his first successful attempt at entering the tub on his own. yippie?

g

Mr. Mom Day - Part 1

2009-11-14T22:46:00.000-05:00

First let me say that many people in the know about this day of mine can't wait for whatever happens to be posted in this blog. Sooooo, who am I to disappoint?
~~~~~~~~~~
DaMom's birthday was back in October and her sister (Aunty K.) and mother (Memere) got her a special gift. A day without DaKids and a trip to see the Radio City Christmas Spectacular Starring the Rockettes in NYC. This means it's the first day in history DaKids won't have their mommy to ~~push around~~ love and cherish for an entire day.

5:30am - DaMom gets up and prepares for her adventure. I sleep.
7:00am -DaGirl wanders into our room and climbs into bed with me. She has ~~an annoying~~ a precious little habit of rubbing your belly when she's tired or your sleeping. She does this to me on my right while I try to fake sleep to keep the dog on my left from washing my face.
7:15am - DaBoy has been chanting MOMMMM for the last few minutes and I send DaGirl into his room to "talk" with him. She scurries out to his room and discusses the placement of his stuffed animals on his floor with him. I try to sleep more.
7:30am - DaGirl has been in and out of all three bedrooms so many times I can't count and since she's now attacking the jewlery box in our room I figure it must be time to get the day going.

I get dressed and bring them all downstairs. After the obligatory diaper changing and potty going, I ask DaGirl "What do you want for breakfast?" She replies with "Waffles and sausages".

OK. I know we have some frozen waffles left over from a batch we made a couple of weeks ago but I'm not sure about the sausages. After a brief hunt in both freezers for breakfast sausages I can't find any. During my search DaGirl has been chanting "Waffles and Sausages" and getting DaBoy fired up for them too. Uh Oh....

DaGoof: Uh sorry guys we don't have any sausages.
DaGirl: EEKKK!
DaBoy: NA!!
DaGoof: What else would you guys like?
DaGirl: Waffles and Sasuages!
DaBoy: Emphatic head nod

They both are looking up at me with puppy dog eyes.

DaGoof: Do you want to go get some. (yes I'm a pushover)
DaGirl & DaBoy: YEAH!
DaGoof: OK, but you have get dressed first.
DaGirl: OK
DaGoof: Go pick out some clothes. "DaBoy" come with me.

I get DaBoy dressed while DaGirl retrieves her own outfit and proceeds to get dressed (including shoes) all on her own.

8:15am - We arrive at the grocery store and they jump into one of those carriages with a fire truck attached. We speed shop and leave in minutes with our sausages, bananas, and orange juice (DaGirl sounds like a vetran smoker this morning so I figure I'd better use any means possible to get her full of fluids).

8:30am - We eat breakfast.

9:00am - I have to cancel a potential play date due to her oncoming cold. DaGirl wants to watch a video. I say "Do you want to go to the library instead?" OK and we're off again.
9:34am - We roll up at the library when it dawns on me "I hope they're open this early?" Sure enough they open at 9:30. Whew.
We turn in DaMoms books and a Sesame Street video. Then find a new S.S. video and a couple of board books.

10:00am - Back at the house. We watch the new video and bonus features.
11:15am - I have to potty. I tell DaKids not to break anything or kill each other for five minutes. I'm in the bathroom for about 4 minutes when DaGirl barges in with the announcement "(DaBoy)'s made a mess in the kitchen". Ug, no peace. When I get to the kitchen DaBoy is standing on a chair filling and dumping a cup with water from the dispenser on the fridge. The floor is one big puddle and he's soaked. I soak the mess up and dry him off.
11:30am - Lunch time. They request a PB&J sandwich with a side of apple bomb. (Apple bomb - apple cut in half cored with a melon baller and filled with peanut butter.) And yes, we have no peanut alergies in this family.
12:00pm - Clean up and head 'em up for nap time. I sit with DaBoy for a spell, while he fights sleep and then head over to DaGirl's room to usher her off to sleep. I read her the story about germs we got from the library, cuddled with her for a few minutes, put her in bed, and by the time I finished a chapter in Harry Potter 5 she was out.
1:00pm - Dishes, laundry, and write this literary epic.

To be continued...

g

Mr. Mom Day - Part 2

2009-11-14T22:45:00.001-05:00

So maybe a 3 and 1/2 hour nap might be a little long for them, I want them to stay healthy!

12:30pm - 4:00pm - They slept. DaMom is going to PO'd at that one since yesterday DaGirl napped for all of 30 minutes. But don't worry, it all comes around.

4:00pm - Snack time I put together a concoction of O's, raisins, dried cranberries, chocolate chips, and vanilla chips. Hey, it was mostly healthy, plus they liked it! (wonder why?)

4:15pm - We play for a bit in the living room then they discover the "accessory set" for the easel somewhere and announce they want to paint. DaGirl is holding the paint containers up at me while DaBoy is marching around in circles holding a paintbrush like a baton.
I set them up at the table with art supplies. They both craft paper taped down in front of them however DaBoy only gets crayons while DaGirl gets the watercolor paints. After about 20 minutes of them ~~being~~ ~~creative~~ making a mess, I drag them off to be cleaned up. Yes, DaBoy grew weary of the crayons and just had to play with the paints, which subsequently initiated the cleanup process when all he wanted to do was pick up and drop the brush water.

5:00pm - The dog is driving me nuts. Since 2:00 he's been stuck to my side and won't leave me alone. I've let him out at least once an hour but he still wants a walk. The rain appears to have subsided for now so I bundle the kids up and usher them out for a quick walk with the dog.

5:45pm - Play some more with the kids (Can't say what we did exactly, they've both got attention spans like gnats and my memory for that stuff is gone. Suffice it to say we did a bit 'o everything.)

6:15pm - Dinner. I reheat leftover chicken, potatoes, corn, apple sauce, and STOVE TOP! I'm great with a microwave.

6:45pm - Neither child is too thrilled with the idea of bath time so I make the executive decision to skip it. They get it in the morning after breakfast before Aunty N's Birthday Brunch. Makes sense right? Let them get all filthy during breakfast and hose them off before the party. It's justified in my mind anyway.
We play blocks for a while and when DaBoy starts falling down randomly I know he's ready for bed, so I set DaGirl in front of the electronic babysitter with an S.S. DVD and get him changed for bed.

He watches the show for a bit but when he gets antsy I bring him up to bed.

7:45pm - The show is over but she wants to see more of the bonus songs on the DVD. I oblige her one at a time but after the third song we're done

8:00pm - I bring her up to bed.
She doesn't want to be in her room yet.
I coerce her with a story. We read the germ book again.
When finished I ask her if she has to go potty. "No." The standard answer.
I take her to potty anyway. Remember the comment in the other post about the fluids? Yeah, she needed to go.
Back into her room for some cuddles.
I put her in bed. She starts bouncing off the walls.
She runs to the bathroom shouting "Have ta poop." She doesn't and I usher her to bed again.
I sit in her room, in the dark, to keep her in bed.

9:00pm - I give up and come down stairs. 5 minutes later head back up stairs to fish her out of the bathroom once again. This time she's trying to play in the sink.

9:15pm - I start the dishwasher and can no longer hear what she's doing upstairs. And I'm OK with that. She might be in her bed she could be in ours we'll see when I get up there.

10:00pm - DaMom returns home and fills me in on her excitements of the day.
~~~~~~~~~~~
So there you have it. No insanity pleas. No ER visits. No temper tantrums (on my part anyway). No Gulliver's Travels re-enactments in the living room.

The Art of the Bus Chase - Part 1

2009-11-14T14:45:00.041-05:00

Since the time change my bike commuting mileage has declined drastically. I'm still riding pretty much everyday but been a slave to the bus. It's too cold in the morning to ride the whole way and too dark at night to ride over the notch. Gone are the weeks where I could click off 131 miles. I'm down to about 60 miles per week.

The funny thing is I'm more sore now at the lower mileage than the high mileage. I've never been one to ride slow, typically I ride the 13.1 mile ride home in 52 minutes. That's an average speed of 15.1 mph and I have a big hill ("The Notch") that drops my speed to 6 mph for five minutes or so. Yes, typically my speedo reads high teens and low twenties.

My morning commute is all of 4.1 miles when riding the bus everyday. I need to be out of the house by 7:15 in the morning to catch it at the college and I get off at the center of town. I don't pace myself too hard to get into work, it is work after all.

At night I need to get out of work right at 5:00 or I run the risk of missing the bus at a college just before the Notch. Here's where I push it a bit, I cover the 7.9 miles in 25 minutes or less (18.9mph avg). The bus leaves @5:30 so I need to be on my game and get moving to ensure I get to the stop in time.

It's not unlike some bizarre art form. Blasting through busy college and downtown areas, passing scores of buses and slowly moving cars only to catch and/or race bus because it's too dark for one section of road.

{backposted}

Like Trying to Get Blood from a Stone

2009-11-04T22:45:00.001-05:00

Today was DaGirl's third day of preschool. She did not want to go this morning and put up quite a fight. Once she was there all was well and had a good day.

DaMom had to wake DaGirl from her nap so we would get her to bed tonight. Who knew preschool was so tough?

After her nap DaGirl ran off with DaMom's keys while she was doing some dishes before dinner.

After dinner, when DaMom was about to leave for quilting class she asked DaGirl where her keys were. DaGirl's response "On the hook!"
Nope not there.
We scour the living room searching blindly for the keys to no avail.

DaGoof: Where are mommy's keys?
DaGirl: On the couch.
DaGoof: No they are not there. Where are mommy's keys?
DaGirl: On the couch.
DaGoof: No they are not there. Where are mommy's keys?
DaGirl: On the couch.
DaGoof: No they are not there. Where are mommy's keys?
DaGirl: Come wif me
DaGirl heads to the living room, I follow. She gets down on all fours and looks under the futon.
DaGirl: Keys aren't here? Where are mommy's keys? Take wif her?
DaGoof: No (shaking head)

Meanwhile DaBoy is heading up the stairs and I give chase.
DaGoof: Where are you going little buddy?
DaBoy: Mommy (and points up the stairs)
DaGoof: Mommy's not here.
DaBoy: kassss
DaGoof: Huh?
DaBoy runs to DaGirl's door and points inside and says "mommy" very enthusiastically.

I figure maybe he knows where the treasure is hidden so I search her room with no luck.

Back downstairs we go and search some more.
With kids in tow I search the living room again, the dining room, and the kitchen. When I open the cabinet door to the garbage DaGirl says "No daddy that's for garbage."

I give up and put DaKids to bed....and search some more....with no luck.

Was this DaGirl's ultimate attempt at getting out of school tomorrow or did DaBoy get a hold of them and relocate them to parts unknown?

Stay tuned until next time...

g

*EDIT*
It turns out DaBoy was right, the keys were in DaGirl's room. Tucked in between the seat cushions of her chair.

When we asked DaGirl this morning who put the keys there she replied with a shrug of the shoulders and "DaBoy".

When we asked DaBoy this morning if he put the keys there he replied with an emphatic head nod , "yes".

So it appears I should have followed the 16 month old more closely and saved an evening of searching.

The Fainting Bike

2009-10-26T22:00:00.000-04:00

I did something tonight I have never done in 3500 miles of riding Broken Spoke. Something pretty dumb.

I typically ride along one stretch of road on the middle chain ring and tonight when I got to a small hill I realized I was still on the big ring. I click the shifter (brifter) and tick, tick ,tick. What the? (Sometimes when up shifting the chain will overshoot and fall off the big ring. Sometimes when downshifting the chain is slow to drop to the next ring. It's not an adjustment thing, it's just a finicky POS setup that sometimes has issues.) I look down and click the shifter again, tick, tick, tick and jump. The chain jumps clear off the small ring. Crap.

Now normally if the chain falls off I'd just stop the bike and fix it. Not tonight. I was being stubborn in trying to get the chain to shift and since the whole reason for wanting to down shift in the first place was the hill I was starting to climb, I didn't realize how fast I slowed down. And subsequently stopped....

I tried to get my feet unclipped quickly but couldn't; PLOP. Right on my left side in the middle of the road still clipped into the pedals. From a bystanders' point of view I must have looked like a fainting goat...or an idiot. I'm betting on the idiot analogy.

Finally the clips let go of my feet and I get up. I look over the bike, get the chain back on, and collect the one casualty in the whole fiasco, the front wheel reflector. I have no idea how that managed to shatter but but it did so in spectacular fashion.

There's something I haven't done since sometime in 2000 on the mountain bike only this time the only thing hurt was my pride.

g

Fire Station Open House

2009-10-11T22:15:00.005-04:00

Today I took DaGirl to our fire station's open house. Needless to say she is my daughter and loved every minute of it.

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Busy Weekend

2009-10-11T22:08:00.003-04:00

How to wear out toddlers:

Step 1 - 10:30 showing of Sesame Street live.
Step 2 - Lunch out...with ice cream.

Step 3 - Go to park and play. While there scamper across the way to the horse rings and watch the horses exercise.

Step 4 - Allow them 1 half hour nap...OK they passed out in the car.

Step 5 - Take them and the dog for a three mile walk around the duck pond.

DaKids were a bit tired today...

g

Still Fixable?

2009-10-11T14:54:00.004-04:00

From the "Good Design" file

Yes, there are somethings in this world that are still fixable. Take this keyboard for example. Had I known it was going to be as cheap and easy as it was to replace I would have done in a year ago. Less than $30 and fifteen minutes later we have the use of the L, Shift, Ctrl, F6, comma keys and the F8 key doesn't look like it's about to fall off.

Now about that check engine light...

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The Perfect Job

2009-10-09T08:51:00.004-04:00

What is the perfect Job?

...Besides the unobtainable occupation where I'm paid gobs of money to do whatever I want, whenever I want to do it....

So what do I think the criteria are for a perfect job:

It should cater to ones strengths but still offer a challenge to ones weaknesses.
It should be enjoyable. Happiness is key to everything in life. Mini-dramas are not required.
It should be dynamic. Constantly repeating the same tasks is just work.
It should be agreeable with your one's body to walk through the door.
It should have an employer who view's their employees as assets.

I am a Mechanical Engineer. I find sitting down and analyzing a structure the most god awful task on the planet. As a matter of fact, just about everything that was taught in college I find to be useless. I do not like deriving formulas or solving complicated math expressions. It is very rare for me to sing praise for engineering. In general I have had some crappy experiences in this field.

So, how does my present job compare to the ideals above?:

I am a hands on type of person. If it is broken I will fix it. (DaGirl thinks I am some kind of god.) If 10 pounds of stuff need to fit into a 5 pound bag, I will get it in there. I have been using 3d software for 10 years now and it has become an extension of my brain. I think in 3d. Diplomacy was a weakness but now I need to be diplomatic when receiving and presenting ideas.
Bringing a bizarre concept to life from a crazy PhD is satisfying. I start with some hair-brained scheme and turn it into a tangible product that the PhD's are amazed by. I don't have to deal with dramas set up by people who are looking to hide something from others. I am a department of one and operate mostly autonomously accomplishing my tasks in a timely manner.
Throughout a project I will conceive a plan, model it in CAD, check it in CAD, send out drawings for manufacturing, handle any manufacturing issues, receive the parts, test fit parts, modify parts as required (me and the mill), send parts off for finishing (plating, painting, etc.), receive parts from finishing, reassemble machined parts, pass the assembly over to an electrical technician for wiring and cabling, handle any of the technicians issues and once the system is operating and ready to ship I'll box it up and load it onto the truck. That is a dynamic position.
In the past, I have sleep-walked (or driven) to jobs and then been filled with dread as I opened the door, surprised that I was there already and loathing what lies ahead. In the last 4 1/2 years I've been here I have never had that sensation walking in the door. Sure there have been times when I'd rather be elsewhere but it's never been the job itself that has gotten me down or made me feel physically ill.
My employers can be flakes. They are PhD's who get wrapped up in their theories and coding. They have the vision but lack the contrast to see the true final picture. They rely on their employees to create all of the fine details they can not foresee and then covert them into a finished product. They may not always seem appreciative but they know why the product is going out the door and are generous with their compensation as a result. They want me to be happy and be stress free. They are more than willing to hire another ME of my choosing.

In the past I have been at places where my employers have:
...barely even noticed me.
...not allowed me to go beyond my department.
...required me to get permission to make a change to a drawing that I goofed up and no parts have been made yet.
...not allowed me to complete a task, always interrupting one job for another "more critical" one.
...generated stress and wanted it that way.

This job isn't always sunshine and roses but I guess I have found the perfect job...
for me...

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Words and Phrases - Part II

2009-10-09T08:44:00.005-04:00

Remember Words and Phrases? This one just phoned in from DaMom...

"...DaGirl was eating a cheese stick and left part of it on the table. I was in the kitchen and when I came around the corner there she was holding the dogs collar saying "Damm Dog, that's my cheeeese stik. You leave it alone"..."

I think we're up for parents of the year award, eh?

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They Might Be Giants

2009-10-07T14:31:00.001-04:00

This is too awesome not to share.

The Incredible Restraint of DaBoy

2009-10-05T12:48:00.004-04:00

We went to a 4 year old's birthday party yesterday. DaGirl adores this little boy and will sometimes run around the house with his picture. I never hear the end of it if his father comes over to do some work to our house "S____'s dad was here. You like new door? You like new windows? S____'s dad did it." That can go on for a bit.

So back to the party. They rented a bounce house since there were several kids under 5 there from S____'s preschool and they all got along well. Well....enough. There was no way I could ever keep DaGirl out of it and once DaBoy figured out what big sis was up to, he wanted in.

I guess I'm a "bad parent" for putting a 15 month old in a bounce house but I know what he can handle (read The Fall Guy). He tried to climb in on his own and with a little help from me to get up the steps he dove right in and loved every moment of it. He couldn't stand up when the other kids were bouncing, but he loved being tossed around on a floor that wouldn't stop moving.

They had balloons in there for the kids to toss around while bouncing and DaBoy found it best to stay along the side and play with these balloons and avoid anyone crashing into him. All of the kids were great and left him alone, but one. DX.

DX wanted whatever balloon DaBoy was holding. He would just snatch it right out of DaBoy's hands. Well, I started getting more than a bit annoyed by this, but there were enough balloons that DaBoy would keep grabbing another and not be phased by DX's aggression.

Meanwhile I'm thinking "DaBoy is getting tired, you keep taking his balloons, I'm not going to stop him when he bites you.... I'm bad parent..... If I were DaBoy, I'd have clubbed him by now."

DX's mom caught him swiping the balloons and took him out for a chat. DaBoy didn't care at all and went right back to playing with his balloons. For all of their aggressive tendancies (that I'm sure they got from me) DaKids are pretty good when out in those types of functions. DaMom told me afterward, DX has some issues and how second children are used to things being taken away by older kids.

Kudos to him for showing restraint.
If I were 15 months old, I would have decked him.

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ARE WE THERE YET?

2009-09-11T22:53:00.006-04:00

I realized last week that all I had to do was ride three days and I'd reach my bike mileage goal for the year.

After two days in the books on a holiday week, progress screeched into slow motion.

We all got colds. DaBoy was up most of Wednesday night. I went to the dentist at 6:30am. I just couldn't justify a bike ride so I took the truck on Thursday.

Tired and sick Friday morning I took the bus into work but rode the bike home.

I'm within 9 miles of the goal but won't get there until Monday.

Setting silly goals sucks!

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Mass Transit and Biking

2009-09-11T21:52:00.003-04:00

As I've mentioned before I can get to work in a couple of ways; by bike, by car, or by bike/bus/bike (some call this intermodal, I like b/b/b better!). The only problem is that the bus only runs during the school year. Since it is primarily shuttling people between colleges and the busses are driven by college students, I can't fault them for shutting down my route during the summer.

My route and the bus route are identical sans the zig zaging through campuses the bus does. When I rode the bus last fall and spring I had the bus routine down pretty well and could easily ride a ways and meet a bus at a stop of my choosing. If I were tired, or it was dark, or even if the weather was getting bad I knew the stop times well enough that I could pick a spot and catch a bus.

Today was a bit different. Due to a nagging head cold, I took the bus in the morning but left work late and couldn't remember the later times for the bus ride home (plus I lost my copy of the schedule). I didn't see the bus at the "mall" stop and figured it was in front of me already. Not quite. It flew past me just before the small town green and I saw it do a quick stop (like a quick step in dancing only with a bus) at that stop and tear off down the road. When it stopped at the church I passed it as it was trying to get back into traffic.

By this point I was feeling good and figured I could get to the 3rd college on the route and then decide if I wanted to ride it. How you ask? The bus is supposed to stop at the 3rd college and wait for transfers from another bus and let time pass to get back on schedule. The route time between the 2nd and 3rd stops is padded to allow for the traffic back ups that occur at that time of day. Those same back ups allow me to shoot ahead of the bus and get to the 3rd college just as the bus is getting there. Usually.

The bus flew past me, literally, just before the 3rd campus. Now I'm thinking "I don't want this bus passing me as I climb the notch, it's to much of a speed demon. I'll catch it at Atkins since he's probably going to quick stop the in-campus stops, blow off the wait time, and take a long break at the 4th college"

So I waited at Atkins...for 10 minutes...no bus. "Damn he must have shot though campus and beaten me here. There's no traffic and it could take the left turns with ease." I was getting cold and decided to ride up the notch anyway.

DOH! Guess who passed me halfway up the hill? Creeping slowly past as if to haunt my impatience.

I guess I need to learn my schedules again.
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How is one supposed to react....

2009-09-10T16:00:00.000-04:00

....when one sees 700 hours of their labor floating through the Swiss Alps attached to a whirlybird by a shoe string?

A host of questions sprang to mind:

Did it fall?
Did they break it?
I thought they wanted a towable system. Did they really want a flight system?
What is that thing hanging behind it?
Why is the mountain terraced like that?
How did they terrace the mountain like that?

It got to it's mountain top hideaway safely. (*snaps fingers* aw shucks)

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How I Spent My Summer Vacation

2009-09-03T23:00:00.000-04:00

Friday night (day 0 - 21Aug09):
We had dinner out while Aunty K and Memere watched the kids. Then a little trip to B&N for book research on what we were going to do this week.

Saturday (day 1):
I insulated and dry walled the new windows in the entryway while DaMom fretted over her car dying that morning when she tried to go to the Y.

Sunday (day 2):
I removed the starter from DaMoms car in the morning and then went to a pond in Springfield with her "Supper Club" friends and families. Afterward I put the new starter in her car while they went to have dinner at Memere and Peperes' house.

Monday (day 3):
Got up early to walk the kids and the dog while DaMom slept in a little. We loaded the bikes and kid trailer into the truck and went to a parking lot just over the Coolidge bridge and rode the bikes from there to Look park.

The kids played on a playscape, ate snacks, and played some more. Then we went to the snack bar and had some ice cream. The kids played on a different playscape and finally we road back to the car and truck with two overtired kids screaming. When we got home we ushered sleeping kids to bed while I did some more work on the windows (sanding and more joint compound), then started cutting trim.
If all that wasn't enough we went to the car show at Atkins that night.

Tuesday (day 4):
I went to the dentist, got a haircut, drove to W. SPFLD for the dogs meds, ate lunch out, went to the Beechgrounds splash park, and worked on the window some more.

Wednesday (day 5):
We packed the car and headed to the beach. Rocky Neck beach in CT. DaGirl was so excited to be going to the beach she didn't sleep...at all. She was up from 7am until 9pm with only a brief 1/2 hour nap at 4. They loved getting battered by the waves and playing in the sand. We went for a walk down a nearby boardwalk then had dinner at a fish house.

Thursday (day 6):
Stayed close to home Took Memere and Pepere out for pizza, and after putting the kids to bed I went to over to Canoez for a primer course in his latest boatbuilding foray. I'm intrigued but not yet sold on it, the design appears to be a bit tight. I'm sure it will be fast as hell, but I need the SUV, not the Sports car these days.

Friday (day 7):
Painted the entryway and primed one wall in the living room while the kids were asleep. After they woke up we went to the Cummington Fair, DaGirl had her first pony ride, ate fair food, watched the magic show , got wet when the skies opened up, and watched the Demolition derby on the side of the hill. That was the highlight of the night for DaGirl, sitting on daddy's shoulders, watching cars bounce into each other laughing and clapping.

Saturday (day 8):
Played with the kids until naptime, painted the primed wall in the living room then primed the remainder, took the kids out for cookies then to Memere and Pepere's for the evening, while we went home and finished painting and installed trim in the entryway. DaMom and I went out for dessert and came home (~10pm) to sleeping children and chatty grandparents (they finally left at 11:15).

Sunday (day 9):
DaMom woke up crabby since DaGirl has been climbing into bed with us between 2 and 5 looking for cuddles and DaBoy NEVER sleeps past 7, ever. We took the kids and dog for a walk around the pond and put them down for naps. when that got up DaMom was still snippy with them so I put her on the lawnmower (her first time on the WheelHorse) and put her to the lawn that really needed to be hayed (4 weeks of growth. eeeww).

And that's the readers digest version of how I spent my summer vacation.
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Classic Bad Design

2009-09-03T22:03:00.005-04:00

As an engineer I have to think ahead of my designs. Things like adding components when the original design doesn't work and servicing the finished product when it breaks are a pair of my biggest concerns. Apparently these considerations are not in the forefront of automobile designers minds.

When the starter quit in DaMom's car last week I discovered just how poorly the designers regard any technician or shade tree mechanic. It's not that I didn't know this before but It's job that should take 15 minutes to do, including collecting and storing the necessary tools.

Any manual I could find inferred the starter was to be removed from under the car. Here is the underside view:That black cylinder behind the S-bending pipe is the starter. Just move the pipe out of the way right? Wrong! It's an air conditioning line that only flexes so far. Why it has to make those bends right here is beyond me as the pipes seem to double back toward the other side of the car.

So how can the starter come out?
Through the top of course:

What? Can't you see it in there? It's under all that wiring with no service loop, the cable protector, and the battery box.

So here's what had to be removed to get this gem out:

The battery cover
The positive voltage distribution board (it sits on top of the battery)
The battery
The battery tray
The little nut that shall not be seen which holds the stupid plastic cable protector in place
Push the much to tight wiring out of the way
and finally remove the starter bolts

So the next time you cringe when you have to pay that "expensive" bill to your mechanic, think of all the crap he had to get though just to get to the problem because the designer/manufacturer did not plan for the replacement of parts that fail.

It makes my truck look really nice and simple to work on....not to mention my bikes.

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Paddling the Mighty Manhan

2009-09-01T23:15:00.002-04:00

Tuesday night Canoez and I went out with an old friend for a paddle along the "mighty" Manhan River. He has a much better write up about it than I can produce, so here's a couple of pictures to remember a wonderful evening.

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Words and Phrases

2009-08-20T12:30:00.000-04:00

Sometimes we use certain words and phrases a little too often around the house and they come back to haunt us.

Case in point:

"I have to go to my Zumba class." DaMom says to DaKids as she leaves on Saturday mornings, (FYI - Zumba is an aerobic dance class at the Y)
"I have to check my email." Simple enough right?
DaMom uses my real name (not daddy) in front of DaKids.

How do we know that we are using them too much, you ask?

When we got home on Sunday night from dinner at Memere and Pepere's house I took DaBoy into the bathroom and got him ready for bed. DaMom was outside picking veggies in the garden. When I exited the bathroom in search of DaGirl I found her laying on the coutch, on her belly, just like DaMom had been doing earlier in the day playing on the computer.

In front of DaGirl was the laptop booting up. She looked up at DaBoy and I, and said, "I have to check my zumba, eff"

*sigh*
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Nutty Squirrels

2009-07-27T12:01:00.005-04:00

Have you ever had a squirrel dart out in front of you, as if on a suicide mission?

Of course you have. Squirrels seem to get a bizarre kick out of playing chicken with cars.

Have you ever had a squirrel dart out in front of you, as if on a suicide mission, while you were biking?

You probably have not, but I have.

I was riding through campus and there were no cars or people around (a truly strange occurrence) when this little black squirrel with a brown and black striped tail appeared on the other side of the road. He very cautiously crept across the lane starting and stopping many times as I approached. I stopped pedaling when I first saw him and was prepared for any necessary evasive maneuvers, I am familiar with their shenanigans.

This guy was stalking me.

I figured I was safe when at about 10 feet away he was stopped in the middle of my travel lane and I was a foot to the right of the white line in a "bike lane". I assumed I would just slide on by and maybe scare him to the other side of the road.

You know what happens when you assume right? You make A$$ of You and Me.

This little bugger faked left and then darted toward my front wheel. I tapped the brakes and he was within an inch of getting run over by the tire. Or more appropriately flipping me over the handlebars. Literally, if you made a vertical line from the leading edge of the tire to the ground, he was between that line and the tire. Much too close for comfort.

As the saying up North goes;
"Brake for squirrels, It could save your life"

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BANG!!!

2009-07-25T12:44:00.006-04:00

I took DaKids for a bike ride this morning and we stopped at the Commons to listen to a storyteller/musician's performance.

It was a nice ride even though DaGirl kept chanting "faster, faster, go, go". It was the DaBoy's first time in the trailer and he did exceptionally well. It was also the first time I've used the trailer all year. I unfolded it and pumped up the tires just before we left and didn't notice any issues.

umm, yeah.

When we got home I parked the bike in front of the garage door and started taking off my helmet when I heard someone shifting in the trailer and

BANG!!!

I saw four of the biggest eyes looking at me that I have ever seen.
There was even a breeze that accompanied the exploding tire blowing dirt all over my legs.

Glad it happened in the driveway...

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They Never Cease to Amaze

2009-07-13T12:30:00.001-04:00

Today, DaMom was out with the DaKids and when they approached a stop sign, DaGirl blurts out "Look Octagon" clear as can be!

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New Heights

2009-07-13T12:29:00.000-04:00

DaBoy loves heights. He can't get enough of them.
--------------------------------
Yesterday while we were at the park, he climbed (raced up really) the ToddlerTown structure by himself and went down the slide head first. DaMom caught him just as he reached the bottom.
--------------------------------
Today, as I was loading up the bike for work, he pushed DaGirl's chair (with booster seat attached) over to a storage bin in the kitchen. He then climbed the storage bin and was in the process of trying to climb into her seat when I came inside and stopped him.
--------------------------------
Lately he's been standing at a chair (or couch, table, etc.) and lifting one leg back and out to the side. It's the funniest thing. He looks like a little ballerina limbering up.
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New Roof

2009-07-12T15:46:00.001-04:00

So the house needed a new roof. It has needed a new roof since we moved in....8 years ago.

Finally this spring the leak above the kitchen window was bad enough that we had to do something about it. And I wasn't about to add another patch.

First, we went to the Home Show, talked with some contractors, and decided who we wanted to go with. Then some contractors came by looked things over, gave us some lip service, and headed for the hills. Despite my inquires after the initial visit in April and an assurance in May from the Office Manager, I still haven't heard from one company, AT ALL. Another company specializing in metal roofs never even bothered to give me anything other than a sales pitch.

So we bit the bullet and went with the "Largest Local Roofing Company" (LLRC). They just about own the roofing business in this town. They have 6 crews with 6 people in each, their own dumpsters and do gutters.

Now anyone who knows me personally, knows compliments and high praise don't come easy from me. It's just not me. I'm getting better at it for the kids sake but I'll never be one to write a company and tell them how good of a job they did. Which is also why I won't name names here. However these guys are almost deserving of that kind of recognition.

Here's the time line of events:
June 4th: I call the roofers for an appointment.
June 9th: The salesman comes by. He's the typical shmo salesman only younger. We make a deal that night to strip the entire roof, plywood over the main house, the kitchen and the front porch fixing any rot along the way, shingle all of that plus the garage, and new gutters everywhere (thrown in for "free").
June 19th: I call the chimney guy they recommended.
June 20th: The chimney guy comes over to look at it. We needed the entire top of the chimney pulled down 3 rows below the roof, rebuilt, and a stainless steel liner installed.
June 27th: The chimney guy does the job and hauls off the debris from the other chimney I didn't want intersecting the roof anymore. How cool is that?
June 29th: The roofers leave a message that they will be starting the roof on Wednesday the 1st.
July 1st: 7:00am Roofers start the job, dodge raindrops and leave by 1:30. The garage and kitchen are done. The rot was repaired above the kitchen.
July 2nd: 7:00am they're back!! Main house is done by 3:00. (they were caught in a downpour and had to slow down)
July 3rd: 7:00am and starting the front porch. Done roofing by noon and gutters done by mid-afternoon. By 5:00pm the entire job is done, cleaned up, and the dumpster hauled off.
July 6th: Final inspection by the Senior Supervisor of the company. He cleans up a little that they missed and fixed some bent drip edge issues I had and passes off the bill and a survey.

Holy $41T!!! They did the job in less than three days and from what I saw looked like a well oiled machine doing it. There was no BS around their coffee cups when they arrived, they just got to it. Since I've been asked at work, yes, they all spoke English.

Kudos to the Chimney Guy and the Roofers. This is proof that there are still people willing to bust their hump to get a tough job done. This is poignant because there is a house on my ride to work that has been getting it's roof done, with only sporadic progress, for over three weeks now. That house is smaller and in better shape than ours.

It took them considerably less time to do the roof than it did for me write this entry. So if you live in the "Happy Valley" and need a roof or chimney work done, I got some names for ya.

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1000+ Mlies

2009-07-03T22:00:00.004-04:00

This morning I crossed the 1/2 way mark to my 2009 bike mileage goal.

For the curious;
The text in blue is Broken Spoke,
Text in black is Old Ironsides,
Orange ticks are notes to myself (why I didn't ride, mileage variation, or other)

I think 2k is achievable.
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In a Toddler's Eyes...

2009-06-30T13:04:00.001-04:00

...they are responsible for everything.

DaGirl has A LOT of hair and when riding in the car with the windows open it flies all over, which she hates. She will start screaming "window up, Window Up, WINDOW UP" with excessive hand gestures, like levitating the window, until the windows go up.

Today driving back to work from lunch was one such occasion.
DaGirl: window up, Window Up, WINDOW UP
DaGoof: OK OK, hold on.
DaGirl: window up, Window Up, WINDOW UP (gesturing to the window to rise)
Windows go up
DaGirl: I did it! I did it! By my self!
DaGoof: Yes, you made the windows go up. *sigh*
DaMom: What?
DaGoof: (quietly) She thinks she made the windows go up on her own.
DaGoof/DaMom: *Laughter*

Oh, the power of modern electronics. I see lots of "magical" things happening in the coming years.

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The Fall Guy

2009-06-30T12:13:00.001-04:00

New Evolutionary Theory - Forget the Nature versus Nurture crap, young boys dreams are stored in DNA and passed along to their children, 10 fold.

When I was a kid there were several shows (movies and TV) about Hollywood stuntmen or movies showcasing their talent. Some of my favorites included Hooper, The Fall Guy, and of course Smokey and the Bandit and Cannonball Run for the sheer quantity of stunts and destruction they caused. Between the ages of 5 and 12 it was stuff like this that made me want to be a stuntman. I could watch these over and over and not get bored.

According to Wikipedia DNA is:
Deoxyribonucleic acid (DNA) is a nucleic acid that contains the genetic instructions used in the development and functioning of all known living organisms and some viruses. The main role of DNA molecules is the long-term storage of information.

There it is... the last half of the last sentence "long-term storage of information." That phrase holds the proof of my theory. Forget all of the chemical, double helix, mumbo jumbo, my long lost desires are stored in my DNA. My son's personality is blossoming and The Fall Guy of my youth is emerging in him.

I've joked with people that DaGirl is the stunt woman while DaBoy is the crash test dummy. However, the daredevil is really popping out of him. DaGirl has very little fear and apparently feels little pain. She's gotten bumps and bruises before but they don't usually stop her and you can see her calculating what it will take to perform a dangerous action. She'll then perform the action and move on to the next thing.

DaBoy's methods are different. He'll charge right into a task, if he doesn't make it, OK he'll try it until he does, and when he gets it he'll take it to the next level. He may fall and cry a lot but he still tries to accomplish his task. Case in point: My parents got them a kid sized table and folding chairs for xmas (Don't worry, the chairs are pinned and won't fold) and DaBoy had been trying to climb into them but couldn't quite get it. He tumbled out of them a few times but mastered getting on the seat fairly quickly. Next he'd stand up on the seat and hold the back rest. AND THEN ROCK THE CHAIR ON THE BACK TWO LEGS... The chairs have gone on a little vacation.

We have two mini rocking chairs (one was a gift when DaGirl was born and the other DaBoy just got for his birthday) and they are identical in structure with the only difference being the upholstery. If either of these chairs is under something he likes (window, TV, desk top, etc.) he will climb onto the seat, stand up and rock the chair while reaching for the contraband he can't reach from the floor.

"Laser like focus" DaGirl's speech therapist has remarked about DaBoy's attention level.

More cases to make the point:
How many one year olds...
...race their 2.5 year old big sister up a flight of stairs? and almost win?
...climb on top of storage bins and stand to beat on the TV screen.
...hang onto the dog's fur to dog surf around the house.
...can climb up a step stool and stand in less than 3 seconds and start grabbing things off the counter.

Yes, we could (and do) put more stuff away but his partner in crime takes it out again. They really are Bonnie and Clyde, only she's the strong one. She'll drag a bin full of toys around the house and then he'll climb it. Or she'll pull out the step stool, open it, and he'll climb it.

I'm told I was never like this.
I'm told DaMom was never like this.
Aren't we lucky to have such daredevils!

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My Helpful Co-Workers

2009-06-24T12:45:00.003-04:00

When my calculator went missing I put out the company wide call:

If anyone sees a lost, cold and lonely, TI-86 graphing calculator (black), please return it to me. He has been missing for a couple of days now and is probably very scared and might be hiding.

Thanks,
g

In less than one hour these are the responses that came back:

#1

Great, now I'll have to keep an eye on my TI-85, so that it doesn't run off to cavort with your calculator.  Can't you keep that thing on a leash?  I don't want it meddling with my innocent, shall I say chaste, number cruncher.

#2

My calculator really enjoys jazz saxophone. I would recommend wandering around busting out some soulful sax licks... I'm sure that would get him out of hiding.

#3

I saw him hanging out with my slide rule who says she has no idea where he went.

I'm sure he's safe; probably hanging out with my needle nose pliers, dikes, and USB cable.

It is so wonderful working with such kind, thoughtful, and helpful people. NOT!!!

*EDIT*
And a former Co-Worker has chimed in with his comment...
"I'd be careful. The government has probably confiscated your calculator as a weapon of math instruction..."

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A Toddler, A Dog, and The F-Bomb

2009-06-24T12:30:00.002-04:00

Yesterday while playing with a toy that wasn't cooperating with her desires, DaGirl dropped the F-Bomb.

She even used it properly. Not that that was the best word to start the whole word/action recognition thing but at least she started with an easy, universal word. The F-Bomb has so many uses and opens up worlds of creativity in language. Enough of that, this is a serious issue (if only I could stop chuckling).

When DaMom asked her where she heard that word before, DaGirl answered with "Scrappy". Now I'll admit our dog gets blamed for a lot of things but that's because he does a lot of bad things but I don't think cursing is one of his more prevalent faults.

This morning when DaGirl got up she started chanting "F**k F**k F**k F**k"
DaMom: Are you quacking like a duck (a favorite pastime) ?
DaGirl: no
DaMom: Then, what are you saying?
DaGirl: F**K
DaMom: Where did you learn that word?
DaGirl: Scrappy

So there you have it, my dog cusses like a sailor, my daughter is adamant that he taught her how to use it, and we're trying to let the whole thing slide and be forgotten.

Miss Manners she is not.

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Bedtime Snacks

2009-06-18T06:00:00.000-04:00

For some time we've been giving DaKids snacks before bed. These snacks usually include crackers, pretzels, or O's.

lately DaGirl has been asking for one of the strangest "snacks" possible: croutons.

Italian seasoned croutons

Makes one not want to kiss her before bed.

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Cat Outside!!!

2009-06-17T22:39:00.003-04:00

"Cat out! Cat outside!" DaGirl says in her rapid toddler speak.

DaMom: Who let the cat out?
DaGirl: Hmmm
DaMom/DaGoof (simultaneously): Did you let the cat out?
DaGirl: NOOOO!
DaMom: Then who let the cat out?
DaGirl: (pauses) SCRAPPY!!!
DaGoof: The dog let the cat out?
DaGirl: YUP!!!
DaMom/DaGoof: oh.
DaMom: Scrappy opened the door and let Pumpkin out?
DaGirl: yeah.

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Flight of the White Guy

2009-06-15T12:08:00.004-04:00

I can't jump. I've never had that talent. As kid I couldn't even do basketball layup in gym class. What on earth was I thinking when I dove off the foot of the bed Sunday Morning?

Picture this if you will; It's 5:00am. The birds are up but no one else. I'm cozy under the covers in the middle of a wonderful dream (not sure about what), so wonderful a puddle of drool has formed on the sheet under my mouth. Now, I'm a pretty light sleeper, normally I hear the (Dog, cat, kids) before DaMom does. I felt the dog jump up on our bed at ~3:30.

So naturally when I was woken up by the dog having a seizure and DaMom yelling SCRAPPY!, my thought process wasn't entirely coherent. I heard the Dog thrashing about on the floor but my last memory was of him on our bed so I thought he might have just fallen over the foot board or he was hitting the foot board. I sprung up to the sitting position to find him but kept going when I didn't see him on the bed.

It must have been a sight that would have made Superman cringe. Me springing up, diving head first over the head board, sliding down the junk (storage bin, clothes basket, etc.) at the foot of the bed and face planting on the floor in front of the dog.

Why did I fly? The importance of getting to the dog quickly is twofold; First, he'll pee, a lot. It's best to make sure the floor is clear for easier clean up. Second, he can break stuff including himself. It's best to slide him away from hard objects and hold his head up so he doesn't hurt his head on the floor. The vet gets enough of our money with him, ER visits for broken bones caused by seizures are not required to keep them in business.

So how is everyone? He's fine, always is. Twenty minutes later he's a new dog ready to run. Me? I have some scratches on my arm and a couple of bruised ribs, can't imagine from what.

Like I said, I can't jump.
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The Case of the Missing Shear

2009-06-14T11:47:00.000-04:00

At work we utilize a couple of cool local machinists: One, T.S. gets most of our one-off, little stuff since he's a one man shop. J.B. gets the more complicated (CNC) and higher quantity parts. The cool part about both is, if I need something quick or for a personal project (govt. job) I can use some of their equipment (band saw, bending brake etc.).

J.B.'s shop is literally 200 yards from work so it's very convenient to walk over when I need to see him. He is a former drag racer who at one time did a lot of work on a top fuel dragster. He has a small bending brake and a sheet metal shear left over from those days that I have been using sporadically over the years when I need to make quick covers or duct work at work.

Several years ago he had a fire at his shop and what wasn't destroyed in the blaze was placed into storage in the barn next door. The barn is owned by the local sawmill/lumberyard/home center that is between us. As payment for letting him use the space, J.B. gave the owner one of his old Bridgeport milling machines. Once the shop was rebuilt most of the equipment brought back in and only a couple of items remained in the barn. One of these items left behind was the shear.

Tennsmith Model 52 Foot-Squaring Shear

The shear is in working order, it needs a little TLC but serviceable, in its location in the barn. The barn is never used for much more than storage and the shear is located in the back behind the usual pile of over stock lumber. The bending brake resides upstairs in the stock area of the shop. J.B. recently made room for the shear to join the brake up there.

The late summer or early fall was the last time I used the shear in the barn. I made three of five air deflectors for a air conditioners needed for a project. I'm not happy with the way said project turned out but that's a story to be told over a beer and a campfire. Now we need the last two air deflectors and I went over to the barn to cut the stock into strips prior to bending and the shear is gone.

Nothing is where it once sat except for some cut offs. The tool is 900+ pounds where did it go? Surely it didn't just sprout legs, crawl over the lumber pile and out the door, did it?

I go over to the shop and J.B. is surprised to hear it's missing as well (since he just made room for it).

We go over to the sawmill and ask around. No one knows anything about it. They don't even know what it is. They say they haven't scrapped any metal, which is readily apparent by the crap strewn around the barns.

So where did it go? Time to call Nancy Drew and the Hardy Boys in on this one.
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What my Commute feels like...

2009-06-08T12:55:00.005-04:00

Yehuda Moon & the Kickstand Cyclery .

It's getting more and more like this every day.

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MWR Facing the Beast

2009-06-08T12:38:00.002-04:00

Goshen County Wy.

Photo by our "Man In the Field", Chad Baldi

Vortex 2 Got One...

2009-06-05T22:54:00.005-04:00

A beautiful yet frightening sight!

Tornado Caught

Congrats guys, hope you got some good data!!!
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Razzzberries

2009-06-04T12:42:00.004-04:00

My kids love razzberries, you know, blowing on their bellies and making that farting sound. They love getting them. They love giving them!

Last night during story time in DaGirls room, DaMom was on the floor with DaBoy and DaGirl was in my lap in the chair as I read. DaBoy was crawling all over the room not staying in one place for more than 30 seconds until....he got behind DaMom.

DaMom was on her side and he climbed up her back, lifted her shirt and started blowing on her belly. The kid is a natural at it. He sounds just like a whoopy cushion. DaMom is pretty ticklish and he started her on a laughing fit.

How do one get an 11.5 month old off if one can't reach him since he's mounted a rear attack?

Naturally I did what any good parent would do to help another parent in need, I sent DaGirl in to help DaBoy mount a frontal assault!!! After a couple of minutes of fart sounds and gasp inducing laughter they grew tired of molesting mommy and stopped. Man it was funny to watch!

DaMom: Why didn't you help me?
DaGoof: It was fun. Besides you needed the laugh.
DaMom: Yeah, well I wish they would do it to you instead of me!
DaGoof: But they know they can get away with it, with you!

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Quote of the night

2009-06-03T22:00:00.002-04:00

"I'M NOT A POW, I'M A MOMMY!!"

DaMom to DaBoy after he started torturing her after his last feeding before bed.

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Driving Impresssions

2009-06-03T12:30:00.001-04:00

When people go to a car show it's not a full body experience. Not that everyone is tripping because of the fumes that may be present but they aren't soaking up all the cars have to offer. To do that one must drive the vintage machinery.

While at a car show people enjoy:

The colors and shapes of the cars with their eyes.
The sounds of the engines with their ears.
The smell of non-emission controlled exhaust (with possibly the sweet smell of race gas) with their nose, and of course old cars just smell different.
The vibration of an open exhaust rumbling past is a whole body sense of touch.
The unfortunate taste of some old coots cigar you walked to close to when he exhaled.

That's all five senses, so how can a car show not be a full body experience? Mix all of that up and roll it into one fear filled ride!

The important thing is to drive the vehicle. Getting a ride in an old coupe from the guy who has owned it for 50 years doesn't count. He's so used to it that it's an extension of himself. The passenger would not notice the subtleties in how the car is reacting to driver input. Sure, they may be bouncing all over the seat and clutching the door since it sounds like a bucket of loose bolts but something is still missing from the experience.

The oldest vehicle I can remember driving was from the late seventies and it had power brakes and power steering. Am I dating myself, yup. Even with all of the playing around with racecars I did in my twenties I never drove an "old car". I've admired cars from the twenties through the sixties since birth and have even ridden in some but never driven such beasts.

What am I getting at? My truck is finally registered and I have actually driven it someplace at a measurable speed, not just around the yard. I've had it now for over 5 1/2 years and the odometer had read less than 8 miles different than when I bought it. I've hauled wood, leaves, rocks, flower pots and even pulled my barn down with it. None of that prepared me for the "thrill" of driving it on the open road.

1966 F-100, I-6 300ci, w/factory 4x4

It's a beast.

Things I've learned about driving it:

Never start in first gear on pavement, in downtown. You will be hearing the echo of your smokey burnout bouncing of the buildings.
Once warmed up the smell of leaked oil burning off of the manifold is rather pungent.
The smell of gas in the closed cab creates headaches.
The approximation of the steering is a riot. Old steering was never as precise as modern machines, I always wondered why my mother's 1970 Dart needed so much steering input on a straight road, now I know.
Braking with manual brakes, stops must be planned well in advance.
Depressing the pedal hard enough will lock up the brakes, put you into a four wheel drift, and stop you in a cloud of smoke.
At 30mph it's looking for 4th gear.
The engine will pull and pull and pull.
The steering wheel is 17 inches in diameter for a reason.
Downshifting takes patience.
All of my senses are over loaded when driving it.

The truck is 90% stock and a time capsule from another era. The pace of life was obviously slower then and this thing doesn't like to be rushed.

It is primitive but a blast to drive.

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What's going on?

2009-05-29T12:30:00.004-04:00

Several people have asked since I've been kinda quiet 'round here.

The short synopsis:

We're in the midst of the worst bedtime issues we've ever had. DaGirl won't go to sleep before 9pm and gets up by 7am. DaBoy is crashing by 7:30 but is usually squawking between 1 and 3am for a diaper change. This is making it hard to get anything but most essential of things done.
The Exploder is done. This past weekend we got some compost for the garden from the dump. Compared to previous loads I've put in the trailer, this was light, but WOW did it not want to pull it or stop it. After we unloaded the trailer it didn't want to start. So I had to do the old floor it, turn the key, dump the clutch and lay strips in the yard (ok maybe laying strips is a bit of an overstatement) and leave it the field to contemplate its future for the night.
The Truck is now registered. The Exploder is not.
Busy as hell at work. I've sent prints out for two systems this week, I expect parts to come back for another next week and have had to consult on the assembly of yet another project. Not to mention the number of times I've been interrupted by bosses to discuss future projects. We are not hurting for work.
The patio at home is one step (many stones really) closer to being done:-)
We can't get contractors to take our money. Funny eh? The garage door people were the only ones to set up a time, stick to it and get the job done. The fence people have finally set up a semi-firm date of next Wednesday but that's taken over a month to get worked out. We need a lot more done but apparently we didn't get on the merry-go-round early enough for people to want our business.
In the past 25 work days I have taken a car 3 times to get there. My pants don't fit right anymore ;-)

That's all for now.

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"I Live for Danger"

2009-05-10T21:28:00.008-04:00

This piece of video awesomeness stars three of my coworkers.

Check out The Weather Channel segment "Vortex 2: I Live for Danger"
What makes it awesome?

"Top Gun" reference.
"Brooklin Hipster" comparison of a South Shore native.
Red Sox plug....
Underwear reference.
The drying of underwear on the radar (actually that might be the only way to sanitize those 2 pair by week 4, way to go Bethany!).
Those shorts!!!
Seeing a smart-ass friend on national TV.

I want write more but I can't stop chuckling...

... so I'll cut and paste the description of the Vortex 2 experiment from their homepage:

VORTEX2 is by far the largest and most ambitious effort ever made to understand tornadoes. We expect over 100 scientists and crew in up to 40 science and support vehicles to participate in this unique, fully nomadic, field program in May/June 2009-2010. The National Science Foundation (NSF) foundation and the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Adminstration (NOAA) together are contributing over $10 million towards this effort. Participants will be drawn from several universities, and several government and private organizations, and will be international including members from Italy, Netherlands, United Kingdom, Canada and Australia.

The basic questions are simple to ask, but hard to answer.

- How, when, and why do tornadoes form? Why some are violent and long lasting while others are weak and short lived?

- What is the structure of tornadoes? How strong are the winds near the ground? How exactly do they do damage?

- How can we learn to forecast tornadoes better? Current warnings have an only 13 minute average lead time and a 70% false alarm rate. Can we make warnings more accurate? Can we warn 30, 45, 60 minutes ahead?

VORTEX2 will use an unprecedented fleet of cutting edge instruments to literally surround tornadoes and the supercell thunderstorms that form them. An armada of 10 mobile radars, including the Doppler On Wheels (DOW) from the Center for Severe Weather Research (CSWR), SMART-Radars from the University of Oklahoma, the NOXP radar from the National Severe Storms Laboratory (NSSL), radars from the University of Massachusetts, the Office of Naval Research and Texas Tech University (TTU), 10 mobile mesonet instrumented vehicles from NSSL and CSWR, 38 deployable instruments including Sticknets (TTU), Tornado-Pods (CSWR), 4 disdrometers (University of Colorado (CU) and U of Illinois), weather balloon launching vans (NSSL, NCAR and SUNY-Oswego), unmanned aircraft (CU), damage survey teams (CSWR, Lyndon State College, NCAR), and photogrammetry teams (Lyndon State Univesity and NCAR), and other instruments.

VORTEX2 is fully nomadic with no home base. Scientists will roam from state to state following severe weather outbreaks through the Plains.

VORTEX2 will hit the road from 10 May - 13 June 2009 and 1 May - 15 June 2010.

Still laughing
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SHWOOOSH...

2009-05-07T21:16:00.001-04:00

So on my way home I'm riding down the Notch, just coasting along, minding my own business with no need to speed then a GAME ON moment came!

Typically if I let the bike coast with no pedaling at all, the bike can hit 30mph, so what's the need to push it? While I was coasting, I heard the sound of air. A strange "shhhhaaawooooshhh" kind of sound. Not the normal air past the ears "shhh" sound. "What is that noise?" I thought. "Is that a truck?A bus? Do I have a flat starting?" Then the roadie I just saw climbing up the other side goes shooting by my left side. Naturally I followed my first instinct. I dropped the plastic coated, friction thumb shifter into high gear and started hammering on the flat top pedals after him.

Now one might think I was trying to catch and pass Speedy Gonzales but I was on Old Ironsides, a bike not exactly known for it's speed. An upright mountain bike converted to commuter with 1.75" road tires, fenders, and a trunk bag on the rear rack will provide no contest to an aluminum (or carbon fiber) speed machine like his. In reality I just wanted to minimize how much he pulled away from me. While I kept him close on the main hill, he started to leave me as the road flattened out. In the 2.5 miles I chased him he only had me by a 1/4 mile when he turned off.

I say I'm not competitive anymore but DaMom says "If you're not the best you don't even try." This in reference to me leaving everyone of our friends in the dust on every bike ride we have tried to take. What can I say, they were so slow! I haven't done that in a real long time and ride pretty slow now. I'd say this little excursion proves I might have a little spunk left, even when it's just for ha ha's and the guy I'm racing doesn't even know he's racing.

So what's the real moral of this story? 40mph on my commuter brick is frightening as hell!

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If You Build It...

2009-05-04T12:11:00.001-04:00

...They will come.

April Super Bike Week

2009-05-02T21:00:00.001-04:00

If May is Bike month, then this is April Super Bike Week!

Monday I rode to work (all of it) on the road bike . On the way home I took a longer route and stopped to pick up a new throttle cable for the lawn mower. Oh yeah and I broke a spoke, hence Broken Spoke was christened.

Tuesday I rode to work (all of it) on Old Ironsides. On the way home I took a different route and stopped to pick up the repaired wheel.

Wednesday I copped out with Broken Spoke and took the bus in the morning but rode home.

Thursday I drove. WHAT!!! What does this have to do with bike week and why did I drive you ask? So I could bring tools from home to install the new bike rack at work! Also I spent my lunch hour helping C.B. get his bike ready to go to out west for Tornado Chasing Season.

Friday I took the bus but rather than getting off in the center of town I mixed it up a bit and got off at Hampshire to get a little more exercise in. I rode the whole way home.

What's all this mean, 97.7 miles in one week! I'm bummed I missed a century by a stinking 2.3 miles. There's always next week.

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New Bike Rack at Work

2009-05-01T12:00:00.004-04:00

I started riding to work occasionally in 2005 and ever since then the bosses have had issues with the bikes being inside or leaning up against the building or some other foolish complaints. When our new office manager started last year and rode most days of the year, the seed was planted for a real bike rack. Presently we have 3-4 people ride regularly and 4 more have done it sporadically. That's not to bad for a company with only 17 people in it.

After much research the bosses wanted a rack that had some style and wasn't just a hoop sticking out of the ground. They decided on a six bike Dero Helix Rack and that those of us using it would install it. Good thing I'm handy, eh?

Today in the rain

Before

Digging Holes

Pouring Concrete

Curing Concrete

It looks pretty neat to me (but I'm style challenged) and since everyone who has seen it likes it, I'll claim it as a success.

Old Bike - New Name

2009-04-28T17:30:00.000-04:00

I don't normally name objects. Sometimes possessions attain monikers due to certain characteristics i.e., Exploder = Explorer (Ford had a recall for a fuel issue and my Explorer being the big wheeled, short wheel base, death trap; the name just seems appropriate).

My bikes have mostly been known by their color or function: Red Bike, White Bike, Blue Bike, Road Bike, Mountain Bike, etc.

A friend and canoe building instructor once wrote several posts about how small boat names need to be earned in his classes; whats in name , and yet another name , pick a name any name and of course "the blue streak" (some of you may recognize my dog and living room)

Anyhow, my 4 year old road bike finally has a name: Broken Spoke.

The name is an old indian name meaning "one who breaks lots of spokes." This is it's second in less than 200 miles. The LBS is recommending I bring it in and have the rear drop out alignment checked. Couldn't hurt.

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Lack of Prior Planning...

2009-04-17T17:30:00.002-04:00

...On Your Part, Does Not Constitute an Emergency on My Part.

At work, I was pulled off of a side track, of a side track, of a side track, twice today for things that absolutely had to be done that instant. This is normal. However where would these guys be if I didn't come in? I probably shouldn't have come in today for various reasons.

I'm essentially a department of one. No one else will pay attention long enough for me to even explain the file system I use.

How would they have gotten their pretty pictures for the proposal that was due today? Just because they've had the proposal for weeks now doesn't mean anything should be mentioned any earlier than the due date, does it?

Who would have talked them off of the ledge and advised against ordering a duplicate part just because they don't want to take the time to figure out the existing parts' code? Spending money solves everything, right?

Who would have contacted a service vendor and started the scheduling process for a job and transferred a pile of information between our customer and our vendor?

Where would they be?
hmmm

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The Eagle has Landed....

2009-04-15T21:21:00.004-04:00

...In the throne.

WoooHooo, DaGirl pooped in the potty voluntarily!!!!

Last night she did her evening business in the potty and not in her diaper. She was so proud of herself she went back into her room and told Scrappy "pooped in potty, pooped in potty."

It was so freakin cute!

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Tolerance for Ignorance - Dwindling

2009-04-10T17:00:00.000-04:00

Once upon a time I had no tolerance for ignorance. Over the last several years I've learned to change and have some compassion toward those who can't be bothered to pay attention to anything.

That compassion is dwindling rapidly.

Today, Tech 1 at work is frantically trying to find some cables and I overhear this. I ask him what project it's for and he gives me the answer I expected. I then ask him if he checked the boxes under the cart the project is sitting on....."uh, no".

Two weeks ago after I finished the rough assembly (I assemble all of the components onto the framework because these "people" can't be bothered to read a print and would call me over anyway), I went over the basics with the Tech 2 and made a point of telling him that when I ordered X, I ordered all the cables he wanted to operate X and they are in the boxes on the bottom cart the system was sitting on.

I ask Tech 1 "Did you look in the boxes on the cart below the system?"

Tech 1 - blank stare

I explain "I ordered everything Tech 2 wanted that was used in the 'previous' system".

Tech 1 scurries off.

I follow a few minutes later just to confirm my expectations.

They had it all along, not 5 feet from them, and managed to get themselves, a software person, and a network tech all worked up and searching for a red herring over nothing.

Like I said, my tolerance in dwindling.

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ER Visits

2009-04-07T11:59:00.004-04:00

I am tired of hospitals.

Since January 2008 we (the 4 of us) have been customers at hospitals a total of 8 times!

The Rundown for posterity:
Jan 08 - DaMom is pregnant with the flu, she gets dehydrated and requires 3 bags of fluid.
Jun 08 - DaBoy is Born.
Jul 08 - DaMom has an emergency appendectomy.
Aug 08 - DaGirl tries to climb up the side of the highchair and it falls on her splitting her head open.
Sep 08 - DaBoy has a high fever and the pediatrician sends us to the ER.
Oct 08 - DaGoof cuts his fingers on the table saw.
Mar 09 - DaMom cuts her finger with the razor knife.
Apr 09 - DaBoy goes to the ER for a high fever.

This list does not take into account regular or emergency visits taken care of by the pediatrician's office. There were plenty more of these.

Astute readers will notice the void in emergency visits between October 08 and Mar 09. I believe this was because my father's long term stay in the hospital was acting as kryptonite against the forces that draw us into the ER.

The April 09 visit was last night and has us quite PO'd with our pediatrician. Late Sunday, DaBoy started with a fever of 103°F. Motrin knocked it down (100°F min) for a while but it spiked back up to 104°F by Monday afternoon. He was not a happy camper and wasn't comfortable in his own skin.

With a fever that high in a 9 month old no one is going to mess around so we call the pediatrician and get an appointment for 7:30pm. They check him out and can't find anything wrong. They give him more Motrin since he was due for his next dose anyway and send us to the ER claiming they can't do any lab work at this time of night.

Off we go to the only pediatric unit around which happens to be at the busiest ER in the area. We wait and wait and wait and wait and then finally see the triage nurse. By this time (2 hours) he's due for his next dose so they give it to him. We then go and wait some more. In a relatively short time we get called into the pediatric unit and wait some more. Finally we see the doctor who isn't willing to take blood for labs but will only take a urine sample. How do get pee on demand from a 9 month old? One word that makes men cringe that I shall not repeat here.

They rule out a UTI and send us home......WTF!!!
4 Hours in the ER, another hour at the pediatrician's office, $65 in co-pays and what did we get in return? One very pricey sippy cup and a popsicle he didn't eat!!!!

We got home at 12:30 this morning. DaBoy and DaGirl were both up at 3:00 looking for diapers and cuddles. I didn't get back to bed until 4:30.

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Barn Razing

2009-04-06T12:33:00.004-04:00

We bought our house in 2001. On the property was a 12' x 20', dilapidated two story barn. I always had plans of rebuilding the barn but the original woodwork was almost to the point of no return and lack of funding prohibited any major work on it at the time.

This winter the roof finally gave way and started taking some of the floor with it.

It was now truly unsafe, especially when a 2 year old thinks it's a great place to play around.

So what do you do when a structure is too unsafe to systematically dismantle?
You hook an old pick up truck to it an pull!

But sometimes things don't go as planned. On the first pull, I ripped a hole clear through the middle of the barn but left the sides and roof intact. To think I was worried about them falling down on their own?

The second tug proved more dramatic but I forgot to get some pictures of it, oops! Once again, things went a little wrong. The floor dropped and I basically pulled it through the brickwork on the back of the barn.

Not bad for one day of work! I still have to clean out the junk inside the brickwork but that can wait for another day.

And a special shout out to C.B.! Thanks for your help!!!
And with any luck gangrene won't set into your foot.... ;-)

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Flash

2009-04-05T21:04:00.006-04:00

So we were at that fast food joint today with the playscape and DaGirl got a "little" something extra.

I took DaGirl to the restroom and while I was helping her wash her hands, a little boy came in by himself and went to the urinal. We turned around to dry our hands and this 5 or 6 year old faces us and says "Hi".

We both turn back to look at him and simultaneously say "Hi".

During the split second we're still looking at him he says "My name is Zack" and drops his pants to his knees, then slowly turns toward the urinal. I quickly point DaGirl back toward the drier before she giggles (she giggles at everything) at "Zack's" willie and zoom out the door.

All I could think of was my two year old (who has a thing for older boys anyway) was just given a peep show (a comedy really) by a very unabashed and ill equipped boy flasher.

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Slave Driver

2009-04-03T12:35:00.000-04:00

It is nice to know that my wife cares about me, but man, she can be a demanding coach!

When I ride by bike to work, I call her when I get there to let her know I have arrived safely. I will call her regardless of whether I rode the whole way or did the Bike/Bus/Bike thing.

My best time for this commute, on the road bike, with traffic lights in my favor, no pedestrians in the cross walks, minimal traffic and in the summer after plenty of time in the saddle was 40 minutes for the 13.1 miles. Avg of ~19.5mph.

My typical time on the Old Ironsides, not pushing it, with traffic, pedestrians, stop lights, etc. is 50 minutes. Avg of ~15.7mph

I was able to get DaMom to agree to give me 1 hour before she started with the search party stuff.

Today was the first time this year I rode to work the entire way. I was on Old Ironsides and he wasn't all that happy, I was feeling the ride, and I got stuck at several lights and crosswalks. It took me 65 minutes to get there.

Like a vicious Drill Sargent she was on the phone at 60 minutes looking for me and told the Office Manager to have me call her as soon as I got in. As soon as I got to my desk I did just that and was told "I expect your ride to take 1 hour and you to call me in an hour, there are no excuses!"

When DaKids go to school and DaMom goes back to work I think she should become one of those fat camp personal trainers who don't accept excuses for anything!

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146 DAYS

2009-04-03T11:51:00.000-04:00

FYI
After 146 days in the hospital my father is finally home!
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My Best Bike Stories - Part 3 - Tornado Alley

2009-03-27T06:00:00.001-04:00

Tornado Alley - 2000

On Memorial Day Weekend DaMom (at the time she was DaWife) and I went to Pennsylvania for a camping trip with a bunch of our friends from college. We had been in the working world for a couple of years and this was the first time we had all gotten together since college. The State Park we were camping at supposedly had a great reputation for quality mountain biking trails which was why we were there.

On Saturday only 3 of the 7 of us decided to go out in search of trails. Apparently I intimidated the others (I don't get it). We stopped by the ranger station first to get a map and ask what were best novice trails (D. and J.W. were afraid I'd leave them in the dust. Again what's with the intimidation). The Ranger pointed us in the direction of the trails on the southern side of the mountain where there were ample service roads to get back out of the woods if needed (or desired). The only indication to the trail conditions was a passing mention of "there are some trees down". Being from New England and understanding that every winter knocks trees down and it take a while to clear them in the woods, it never occurred to me that it would mean more than climbing over a couple of logs with bikes. Not a big deal.

We left the ranger station feeling prepared and ready for a good day of riding. J.W. and I had our Camelbaks on loaded up with gear, food and water. I had my full suspension bike (FSB) and D. had my old FSB both tipping the scales around 30lbs each and J.W. had a lighter hardtail.

We started down a nice twisting, fast, fire road that stopped at a downed tree. We hike over the mammoth timber and continue down some single track for ways. We come to a section of downed trees, climb over them and continue on. Then we come to more downed trees and wondering what the heck is going on. The trees looked as if loggers had come through dropping trees for a new road and never cleaned up the mess. All of the trees had no vegetation and were gray, so I knew this devastation wasn't recent but couldn't understand what happened.

In my life I've seen a lot of local woods be clear cut for the construction of mini-malls, McMansions, and to circumvent a conservation commission ruling that wouldn't allow more than X number of acres to be cleared at one time (he got the ~25 acres clearcut the week before the ruling went into effect and now 20+ years later that parcel still sits vacant). So I naturally thought some bonehead developer started dropping trees and was halted by something; cash flow, the court, or public outcry.

We lost any and all signs of a trail and start hiking the edges of the downed tree line trying to find one. After two horrendous hours of hiking with bikes, we finally found a fire road that is in service. We then start the process of figuring out "where the hell are we" and ride a couple of miles back to the ranger station.

We're all PO'd and want to know why so many trees are down. We walk into the ranger station and ask the same green shirted knucklehead what happened to the forest. His response was one for the record books; "What? Trees down?.............. OH YEAH! We had a tornado come through here last year......... Sorry 'bout that."

Gee thanks!

g

"honey, come pick me up"...

2009-03-25T00:30:00.003-04:00

...she said into the phone....

The following incident took place on:
Wednesday March 25th, 2009.

6:30pm - DaMom leaves for quilting class.
8:50pm - The following phone transcript occurred;
ring
DaGoof - Hello?
DaMom - Hi you need to call my parents have them come over watch the kids and come pick me up.
DG - What happened? (I'm thinking the car died or she was in a wreck)
DM - I cut my finger.
DG - Uh, OK (thinking...you cut your finger and can't drive home? I cut my fingers with a table saw and drove myself to the ER and you...)
DM - The Paramedics are on their way and we'll see what they have to say.
DG - Uh, OK, I'll get a hold of your mother.

9:50pm - I arrive at the hospital and discover that she was on her third set of bandages and still bleeding through the bandage.
10:15 She's wheeled to the "Fast Track" section of the ER and get's cleaned up and re-bandaged by a doctor.
10:30 - She gets X-rays done.
11:00 - We're on our way out of the door.
11:30 - Home.

That's the fastest ER trip ever!!!
Trust me I know...(but that's for another post)

What happened? A rotary cutter slipped and nipped the side of the tip of her left index finger while cutting strips for her quilt.

The next few days ought to be a hoot!
g

my fase iz nub

2009-03-24T08:50:00.002-04:00

What was I thinking?
Mr. Weatherman told me it was going to be cold and windy this morning but why would I believe him?
When I got to work the weather station on the roof said 27°F with wind gusts as high as 12mph.
That's a crock o' bull.
The 10 foot flag next door is straight out.
I think I can feel my face again.
g